


The Beautifully Damned

by ShineYunhyeong21



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Friendship/Love, How Do I Tag, M/M, Multi-Era, Past Lives, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-06-26 14:39:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 29,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15665220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShineYunhyeong21/pseuds/ShineYunhyeong21
Summary: "I must have committed a grave sin to be stuck with you for six lives.""My sin must have been greater seeing as how I watched you suffer in the last five."





	1. How did we get here?

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by iKON TV episode 6.   
> I thought it was quiet cute to see that Hanbin and Yunhyeong both wanted to find out what they were in their past life/lives, so I came up with this historically almost accurate (I changed stuffed to fit the story-line) story. Also, at the end I'll try and explain stuff to the best of my ability as I've been doing my research. 
> 
> I hope you guys Enjoy!

The day was a long one as we were running around trying to make sure that everything was right for this episode. I had suggested that we go do Hypnosis as you can see your past lives, past, or psychological state in general, and all the guys seemed to agree with me saying that it was a cool idea. So getting ourselves together we had talked about funny stuff for the show like how Jinhwan Hyung was sure to cry and whatnot. 

Pilling into the van, I sat by the window leaning my head against it as I was excited - not as excited as the others though. I had suggested it but something just didn’t feel right to me. Entering the building we took the elevator up to where the shoot would be and as we stepped off we greeted the staff that would accompany us today. We stood around in the hallway as they hooked up our mics causing me to look at everyone else as they were chatting about what they were going to ask and blah. 

“You guys can go in, now.” Nodding, I smoothed down my hair as we all entered being greeted by the receptionist as he told us to take a seat in the back. 

The murmuring was loud as everyone, including myself, were confused on what was going to happen and how this thing normally went. The hypnotist had come once we settled down and began talking with us about why people came to him and a bunch of other stuff that I was only pretending to listen to. Nodding along, he asked the members what they had wanted to see and as it went down the line, I turned to Hanbin already having a feeling that he was going to talk about peace and happiness. It has been a constant discussion of his as of lately. 

“I want to see what makes me happy and what my past life was.” Silence had taken over after his words but it was soon replaced with a chuckle from the hypnotist.

“Alright.” With our opening discussion out of the way we played rock-paper-scissors to see who would go first, and Bobby had lost so he was first.

Fixing the monitor in front of us, we all watched anxiously as Bobby entered the room taking a seat in this black chair. As per usual, we chatted while watching waiting for it to begin. Bobby had ended up laughing – which had brought us a few giggles as well – and he had also cried, which was weird as we never thought that he would. Donghyuk had gone next and cried as well while talking about his dad, then June went but it didn’t work on him so he came back to the room screaming about how it was unfair. Laughing, Jinhwan Hyung had told him to sit down and stop being loud. Next was Hanbin as in his past life he spoke about wearing a bamboo hat while painting and living freely in the mountains. 

“Yunhyeong, it’s your turn.” Jumping, I had zoned out as nervousness had flooded me as I didn’t know what I was going to say.

Standing, nonetheless, I entered the room greeting the person who was going to lead me into the past. Sitting down, I wiped my hands on my pants as he told me to relax before putting me under causing my neck to go slack. The feeling was weird as my mind and body were in two different places, but at the same time the feeling was nice in a way.   
“Scan yourself.” His voice seemed to be in the sky causing me to look around as I wasn’t in the clinic anymore, I don’t even know where I am. 

“I live in a castle.” Looking in front of me stood a huge castle and as I slowly walked towards it I was being greeted enthusiastically by those around me.

“A castle, okay. What are you doing there?” What was I doing here?

“I think I’m the prince.” The idea itself wasn’t crazy as my attire mimicked one of a prince. “She’s wearing a dress.”

The feeling of a hand on my arm had me turning to see a girl whose face I couldn’t make out, but as she gave me this dazzling smile I couldn’t help but smile back.

“I think we’re to wed.” My smile fell as the words left my mouth because as I turned to the other side I noticed a familiar face.

Closing my eyes, I opened them to get a better look and I was more than shocked to see Hanbin as he stood next to me with hard eyes that reminded me of when we were on W.I.N. I was about to say something but I was suddenly brought out of my past life as the hypnotist asked me if I was okay. Nodding, I stood shaking my head as I left heading back into the room with the others. They laughed saying that I was an attention seeker even in my past life which caused a small smile to come onto my lips. Chanwoo and Jinhwan had gone and the hole time through both of their sessions I couldn’t help but stare at Hanbin. What was he doing there? Was he a friend even way back then?   
Sighing, I ran my hands over my face as the shoot was now over meaning that we were all just going to go home. Taking a step out of the room, I was being yanked back into the room we were all just in causing me to turn around and see that it was Hanbin who was holding onto my arm. He had a look of determination and I couldn’t help but worry.

“Excuse me? Can I ask you something?” The hypnotist turned towards us startled as we stopped right in front of him.

“Sure.” Letting my arm go, I rubbed it wondering why his grip had to be that tight for only a few feet.

“Why was he is in my past life?” Pushing the disrespect aside, my mouth had dropped open as he had experienced the same thing that I did.

“You too?” Staring at one another, it was a little awkward as he clearly saw more than I did. 

“Well, it seems that you two have met on more than one occasion as both of your past lives were different. If you want I can help you figure it out?” Nodding, I wanted to know what this all meant and Hanbin seemed to be right along with me. “Then follow me.”

Telling the manager that we were staying, he gave us weird looks before leaving as he said to call him when we were done. Heading back to the room where our earlier session was held, he told us to sit down on the couch instead as we were going to do this together. 

“Now close your eyes and listen to my voice.” Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath slowly slipping back into the past I wasn’t supposed to know about.


	2. Life 1: A Fated Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set during the Joseon Era  
> \- Yunhyeong is a Crown Prince  
> \- Hanbin is his Personal Guard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want a better feel for the chapter, I suggest listening to Fate by Lee Sunhee.

Joseon, 1886

My hand was in front of my face as I stared at the sun watching how it played on my palm and fingers. A smile graced my features and if it had not been for my adviser blocking the sun, I would have continued to smile. Sighing, I brought my hand down staring up at him as he looked down own me with an indescribable expression. Something must be wrong for him to hold that look instead of his normal smile.

“Crown Prince, you have company waiting for you in the fields.” Frowning, I stood dusting off my _hanbok_ before picking up my _gat_ and placing it on my head to cover my topknot.

“It seems that these are very important people if father is showing him the fields.” He gave a light shrug as we left the shaded area that I was seated in. “Do you have any idea who they are?”

“It seems that they come from the Kim family.” Sighing, I clasped my hands behind my back stretching a little.

“Kim family?” He stopped before we turned the corner, his eyes showing worry and a clear distaste.

“They’re one of the top merchant families in the area. I’m sure you’ve heard of them, your Highness. The wife is also a Lady within the house.” My frown was even deeper as I’ve spent so much studying that I haven’t been able to venture out into the city for a while. “They’ve come baring gifts, and his daughter is exceptionally beautiful, if I do say so myself.”

“Then why don’t you try and woo her, Junhoe-ssi.” A small smile reached his lips as he continued our walk towards where my father, The King, stood.

“Sorry, but that would be impossible as she is here for you.” My throat clenched up a little as the day has seemed to come where I’ll be given a look at the person I’ll spend the rest of my life with.

The field had entered our line of vision and there in the middle of it surrounded by flowers stood three people. Another sigh passed my lips as I dismissed him making my way towards them. She was indeed beautiful from afar; her small frame that was hidden under the puffiness of her _Chima_ , and her fair skin that showed that she apart of higher society. Getting close enough, I called for father slightly bowing my head to our guest that I would now be seeing on a regular basis. I let a small formal smile cover my face as to not show my worry with this current arrangement and the fact that I had no say in the matter.

“Yunhyeong, it seems that you have finally made it.” Lowering my head in apology, I didn’t realize how long they must have been waiting. “No matter, Merchant Kim and I will chat in my study. Can you keep Lady Myeongseong company while we chat?”

“Of course, Father.” He gave her a warm smile before it fell from his face as he looked upon me with expectancy.

Keeping my head lowered until they were out of sight, I slowly straightened myself turning to look at her in awe as her beauty had exceeded what I had saw from afar. She had big doe like eyes, a small straight nose, and pink tinted lips that were formed in the shape of a heart. Lifting her head, her eyes blinked bashfully as a small smile came onto her face and I watched as she covered it with her hand that was concealed in her sleeve.

“Shall I show you the flowers Lady Myeongseong?” Giving me a curt nod, I waited until she was next to me before heading deeper into the fields as the color of the flowers became richer. “You share the same name with my mother.”

“Oh, so I heard, Your Highness.” Stopping in front of a patch of my mother’s favorite flowers, I bent down picking one and turning on the pads of my feet I held it out to her. “You are ever so kind, Your Highness.”

“Take it as my appreciation for your visit, my lady.” With nimble, almost shy fingers, she finally allowed her hand to be shown as it was small like a child’s.

I can tell why Junhoe was struck by her beauty as it was enticing to me as well. Standing, I dusted my hands on my clothing not caring as a bath was to be expected later. Continuing our walk, we had made it all around the field light chatter here and there until we had made our way to the path that lead to the house. Her laughter was quite as I told her a small joke that my close friend, Donghyuk, had told me a few days past.

“Lady Myeongseong and Your Highness.” We both stopped as a male with board shoulders bowed in front of us with the guards clothing on.

“You may rise.” Bowing his head, he stood hands clasped in front of him showing submission that clearly didn’t fit his handsome features. “What can I do for you?”

“In congratulations to your engagement with Lady Myeongseong, I have been assigned as your personal guard until the day of the ceremony.” Oh, and here I thought he was to tell me something of a better importance, particularly something that has to do with the state. 

“Well, Your Highness, I shall take my leave.” Gently bowing her head, I responded to the gesture watching as she walked until her servant had come running towards her with a small smile on her face.

“Now, what should I call you, my loyal Guard?” The smile on my face was wide causing him to blink as I waited for him to respond.

“Kim Hanbin, Your Highness.” Taking his arm, I gave it a firm but gentle squeeze motioning for him to walk along side of me.

“Have you eaten, Hanbin-ssi?” His eyes had softened a little as he gave a few short nods and I couldn’t help but find the action cute.

Should I think of this man’s actions as cute? This man who has been entrusted with my life for a substantial number of days until I am wed. I think it is fine to think of his actions as cute, if I say so myself.

Joseon, 1886 (1 Week Later)

My topknot had fallen allowing my hair to enter my eyes as it fell all over the place, but I didn’t mind as I was focused on the guard in front of me. Swords were wielded in both of our hands as he lightly danced around me scared to fully hit me, and I understood such worry only thing was that the fight wasn’t fun anymore. Lightly stepping back, I lowered my head in defeat and for the first time since we have been joined together he has laughed – it was a weird laugh, but it was a laugh none the less. Running my hands through my hair, I pushed it back allowing its full length to be shown as it ended below my collar but not farther than the bottom of my shoulder blades.

“Your Highness, I am sorry for ruining your hair.” He moved to get down in a deep bow but I stopped him by patting his head as it was fine with me.

“I’ll only accept your apology, if you put it back for me.” Sitting on the porch, I waited with a content smile and my hands on my knees listening as he slowly made his way towards me.

His hands were gentler than I expected them to be as his calloused fingers ran through my hair slowly pulling it up. With one hand he gathered my hair while the other struggled to tie the ribbon that had kept it in place, and after a few minutes more of struggling he had stepped back with worried eyes. Reaching up, I touched it causing a laugh from deep within to come pouring out of me as he had done his best but I would have to get one of the servants to redo it. Thanking him, I wiped the small tears that poured from my ducts as his face was also hilarious. The small pout he gave taking away from the roughness that had taken over his features only moments earlier.

“Crown Prince! It is unbecoming of you to laugh at such a level, and not to mention that there are tears as well.” Junhoe startled me as the door behind me had slid open revealing his studious figure. “Your father would – what has become of your hair?”

“I had Hanbin teach me a few more techniques as my sword fighting skills have become rusty with the limited practice that I am not getting.” His eyes narrowed as he looked between Hanbin and I before nodding as he knew that it was best to take my word. “Can you call a servant to come fix it?”

“I can do that, Your Highness.” The door had closed causing me to turn to Hanbin who had his head down showing respect to the other who had authority over him.

The servant had arrived a short while after with a brush and comb making it tighter and cleaner than the job that Hanbin had done. Bowing, she left running off to wherever she had come from. Glancing at Hanbin, I was about to say something but the figure of my future wife had come into my line of vision looking as graceful as ever. Standing, I gave her a small bow and as she took to standing next to me I looked back one last time to see that Hanbin had moved further back giving us some form of privacy.

“Your Highness, would you care to show me around more? I’ve been wanting to get a feel for the home that I will be a part of.” Nodding, I gave her a smile small walking with her in a direction that she has never been.

The rest of the afternoon was spent like that and Hanbin had kept a good enough distance from us that he wasn’t eavesdropping but he was still close enough of anything would happen. I couldn’t help but take notice of him as he was different from the rest of the guards that have been assigned to me. The funny thing was that he wasn’t even doing anything different from the other guards. Night had fallen and the house was quiet with sleep, only I seemed to be wake along with the guards that were posted in every part of the yard. Well beside mine as Hanbin takes post right outside my door meaning that it’ll be hard for anyone to get past him with ease. Leaning against the door frame, I pulled my feet to my chest listening to his breathing as it was calm and steady.

“Hanbin-ssi?” His breath hitched in his throat before he released it causing it to go back too normal.

“Yes, Your Highness?” A chuckle had broken past my lips ruining the serious nature that I had intended on creating.

“May I ask you a personal question?” It was silent, that much I had expected, but as he turned slowly opening the door I jumped turning around to face him. “What are you doing, Hanbin-ssi?”

“You said it was personal, Your Highness, so I thought it would be fine if we talked face-to-face.” My words had become stuck in my throat noticing that he had a point. “You may ask, Your Highness.”

“Have you ever been in love?” Blinking, I took him in as he looked beautiful under the moonlight that had made his hair shine underneath it.

“I would have to say yes, Your Highness.” Pulling my lips to a pout, I had this sudden urge to hear him say my name even though our relationship wasn’t intimate enough for that to even be possible.

“How did you know?” His head titled a little eliciting a small shrug from him but the smile on his face was anything but small.

“I guess I would have to say that they made me feel happy whenever I wasn’t in a good. Their beauty tended to stand out more, but I feel that their heart is kinder as they smiled at me with a smile that I felt should have never been given to me. The way their hair falls whenever it out of its designated style, and the way how they cutely ask me to help them fix it. It’s the small thing really that make me feel that it is love, Your Highness.” I couldn’t fully see his features but the way how his hands clenched tightly around his pants meant that it was probably an expression that I couldn’t understand.

“Oh, is that so?” Thinking on it, I nodded as it made sense that he would see such actions as cute, or love, if they made his heart flutter. “Thank you for answering my question, Hanbin-ssi. Goodnight.”

Crawling, even though unbecoming, I headed towards my bedding before standing as I would have to get onto the bed. Sighing, I laid down thinking over his words and for some reason no one seemed to come to mind, not even Lady Myeongseong. Closing my eyes, the door had slide close but not before a small sad voice had sliced the air without meaning to.

“Goodnight, Your Highness.” _Thump. Thump. Thump._

What is wrong with my heart?

Joseon, 1886 (2 Weeks Later)

My wedding was right around the corner and I couldn’t help but be divided into two. Of course, I fancied Lady Myeongseong but for some reason my eyes were always focused on Hanbin – I seem to fancy him more. My heart went wild whenever he would accidently brush against me, the Royal Physician says that nothing is wrong with me but I can’t take that answer as it doesn’t explain the way my heart has been acting. Opening the window, in my study, I leaned against it resting my head on the wall that kept me in the room. Sighing, I drowned out Junhoe’s teaching as it was boring and I was tired of hearing it; my mind was elsewhere anyway. 

“Crown Prince!” Jumping, I almost feel out the window causing me to push myself back into the room to see that Junhoe was furious. “I know that the wedding is coming up, but you can’t neglect your studies like this.”

“I apologize for my absentmindedness; it seems that I can’t concentrate as of lately.” His sigh was accompanied with the book shutting close loudly in his hand.

“No need to apologize, next time pay attention. I’ll get a servant to bring you some fruit – it has become warmer as of lately.” Giving him a thankful smile, he stood leaving the room causing me to turn back towards the window.

Below stood Hanbin as he was running around with some children, the smile on his face wasn’t hard to miss. Staring at him, I watched the playful nature that he had exhibited with them and I couldn’t help but wish that it was me. He was always gentle with me, and if I had explained to him that it is fine to be rougher, he is still gentle. I wish he would notice that I am not as fragile as I looked.

“Your Highness,” Turning back, I looked at the servant as she made her way towards me with a tray of fruit. “Word has it that your younger brother will be picked up from the next town over tomorrow evening. He has stopped his traveling to come back for your wedding.”

“Thank you.” Smiling at her, she left leaving me to cover my face as I missed my brother dearly. “I’ll ask if I can go along to pick him up.”

“That would be unthinkable, Your Highness. The guards will go to get Chanwoo and his companion, Jiwon, that he has befriended while on his studies.” Junhoe was soon seated in front of me hand reaching out to grab a small stick to pierce the fruit with.

“Aw, come on, Junhoe-ssi. My wedding is in two days; can I please go to pick them up? I’ll even bring Hanbin with me.” Shaking his head, I frowned a little as it wasn’t fair.

“I’ll speak with your Father, but much won’t come out of it. He wants you unscathed come the wedding, so I don’t think he’ll agree.” Blowing air harshly out of my nose, I stabbed a piece of fruit before turning away to him as I went back to watching Hanbin.

Biting into it, I chopped down on it hated that my freedom has been so limited these last few weeks. I want to go out freely, again. Stuffing the rest of it in my mouth, I glanced down to see that Hanbin was staring up at me with a nice smile that looked pretty to touch. He gave me a slight wave causing my face to heat up. Giving him a quick smile, I turned around putting another piece of fruit into my mouth hoping that it would cool me down. Something must be wrong with me. I’ve never acted this way when I was with Lady Myeongseong; I don’t even think she can get me to smile as widely as he makes me. Could it be that I am in love with Hanbin-ssi?

“If you’re going to space out, shall we get back to your studies?” Chewing on the stick, I couldn’t help but rack my brain thinking about all the things that he said to me two weeks past. “Crown Prince?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. Let’s.” Dropping the stick, I licked my lips mind still on my previous thought.

Night had feel once more, and here we were talking through the door. I continued to ask him personal questions these last few weeks and he seems to be doing the same with me. Is this even proper? Probably not, but I needed to figure this out. Standing, I was going to walk away as the conversation had died out but with my mind not where it should be I wasn’t paying attention. Falling, I landed hard on the ground causing me to groan in pain as I must have bruised something. My door flew open, Hanbin entering with his hand on his sword ready to fight off an imaginary intruder. His eyes flickered to me and noticing my current state, he closed the door before coming to my side.

“Are you okay, Your Highness?” Nodding, I sat up holding my thigh as it seems that it had hit the table leg when I was on my way down.

“I should be fine.” Removing my hand, he gently let his hand graze over my thigh afraid to cause more pain to me. “Shouldn’t you get a better look at it, Hanbin-ssi?”

My heart was thumping hard at the way how his eyes flickered up to look at me. They were dark holding an emotion that I wasn’t yet allowed to experience, but I was ready for it now. Undoing my _baji_ , I slowly slide it down my thighs stopping at my knees and pulling my _jeogori_ out of the way allowed him to see skin that he was never allowed to see. We both stared at my thigh to see the red mark that was sure to fully bruise once night had past and morning had come. His hand shook as he moved to touch it glancing up at me every few seconds to make sure that I was okay with him touching me. Once he had touched it, a shiver had run down my back and my stomach had become tight – my eyes had glossed over making me let out a low whimper at the sudden jolt it gave my body.

“I’m sorry.” He was quick to apologize not even noticing that his hand was now fully pressed against my thigh, fingers playing in the flesh that was soft and warm against his rough and cold digits.

I had suddenly lost all rationality, quickly pulling him into a kiss that he thankfully returned. Pulling away, I was out of breath and by the way how his eyes were lidded with lust I knew that he had also enjoyed it as much as I did. The night was long as we embraced one another taking in each other’s warmth, low groans, and quiet moans not wanting to let anyone in on what we were doing. As he fell on top of me exhaustion under the sweat that covered his face, I held him tightly playing in his hair that was long as it flowed down his back stopping a little below his shoulder blades.

“I love you, Hanbin.” Shifting, he used his arms to push him up so that he hovered above me, a pained look on his face. “I’m sorry that it had to be this way, but my feelings for you are as pure as they ever will be.”

“I love you, too, Yunhyeong.” Tears fell and as he moved to wipe them I leaned into his hand knowing that I’d never be able to feel this warmth and kindness again.

Why had fate shown me true love only to make it so that I couldn’t be with them?

Joseon, 1887

I had married Lady Myeongseong out of respect for my title and my country, not wanting to go back on things that had been put into motion. Selfishly, I had kept Hanbin by my side making him my official guard not wanting to lose him to someone else. I wanted him to only look at me even though I couldn’t look at him. Myeongseong had gotten with child fairly quickly, and as my father was set to rule for another few years, I thought that it was best for us to do what we wanted until I had to succeed the throne. We were in the palace a lot as I took to dragging her around to my favorite places wanting her to enjoy them as much as I did. Hanbin was with us every step of the way, along with her own personal guard, Jinhwan, who held as much pain in his face as Hanbin did. Fate was truly cruel.

“Your Highness, the trip will only take a few days’ travel.” Nodding, I was working on papers assigned to me by father as he told me to make myself useful while I waited. “I’ve also heard that they have great gifts in that city as well.”

Glancing up from my work load, Junhoe had an expectant look on my face causing me to stare at him before it clicked. He wanted me to buy a gift for the Crown Princess, which I could surely do.

“Would you like something, Junhoe-ssi?” He shook his head but his face held a light pink blush at the thought of me buying him something. “I’ll be sure to pick out something nice for you.”

“Crown Prince!” His chiding nature was back causing me to raise my hand cutting off whatever he was going to say.

Taking a clean sheet of paper, I picked up my brush scribbling down a reminder to pick up a few gifts. I might as well get some for the child while I was at it; Hanbin, too. Dismissing him with a wave, I earnestly finished my work not letting the people coming in and out distract me as I was set to leave once night had fell. When it did, I got into the carriage rolling up the bamboo flap that acted as a window only to be met with the sight of Hanbin on a horse. He looked majestic as always and the fact that he knew I was staring warranted a well-hidden blush from him as well. Going back into the carriage, I dropped the flap leaning back into the seat glad that I didn’t have to worry about Myeongseong on this trip. It was only Hanbin and I – the way I had wanted it to be for so long.

The journey there was enjoyable, and after finishing the business I had, I prepared myself for the journey back. Hanbin and I were able to spend a night together which ended in us both shedding silent tears at the thought that the chance would never come again. Shaking my head, I sighed as we headed through the market side-by-side looking at things. I still had gifts to buy and I didn’t want to just pick up anything, so I was really taking my time. Getting everyone something, a smile had come onto my face as I headed towards Hanbin who was fixing my trunk to the top of the carriage.

“Hanbin-ah?” It was the first time I’ve ever called him casually and by the look on his face he was thoroughly surprised. “Here, a gift from your future King.”

Holding out my fist, I had the gift clutched tightly in my hand waiting for him to put out his own. Once he did, I lightly sat it in his palm before pulling my hand away letting our fingers brush against one another. It was nothing more than a red and black bracelet that I thought went well with his everyday attire. His usually hard eyes softened upon looking at it causing me to hold out my other wrist showing him that I held the exact same one.

“I love you, Hanbin-ah.” Leaning in close, I whispered it softly and pulling away with a satisfied smile I climbed into the carriage ready to head out.

The darkness that we were used to seemed even darker as we traveled the same route that we had traveled earlier. I couldn’t sleep as my nerves were on edge at the eeriness of it all. Stopping, I peeked out of the flap only for Hanbin’s hand to come down closing it. Once quiet voices had become loud as the horses screeched in terror at the scene that I wasn’t allowed to see. After a while it had become quiet and letting my curiosity get the best of me, I opened the carriage stepping out and looking around I saw Hanbin in front of the carriage. I was going to call out and ask what was going on but the feeling of something sharp entering my back had stopped me as I looked down seeing that a sword was fully sheath inside of me. The sharp first half of the sword glistened in the moonlight and as I looked up Hanbin was staring at me in pure horror.

“CROWN PRINCE!” The world around me seemed to spin as the sword was snatched out of me.

Falling to my knees, my vision started to blur but only a little as I could make out Hanbin as he got off his horse running to catch me. His arms that have never felt stronger held onto me as fear trembled through the body. The sound of hurried feet fleeing the scene as they cursed knowing what awaited them once they were found out. They’ll be captured, tortured, then killed in the center of the capital for all those that lived there to see. Smiling, I coughed forcing blood up and out of my mouth ignoring the burning sensation that I felt.

“When we meet again s-some time in the future,” Coughing harder than the last time, my body shook violently as I felt my life slipping from me. “please…don’t let me go.”

“I love you, Yunhyeong. I’m deeply in love with you.” The soft whisper of his voice was the last thing I heard in my ear – it was the last time my heart had skipped a beat.

~

The body that laid still in my arms was forever unmoving, not even the blood that painted his lips could wake him. The men around me looked on at the scene with saddened hearts as the crown prince, who has never done anything to anyone was now dead. Killed by the sword of a thief. Calling my horse, it came to me without hesitation and standing from my kneeling position on the ground I brought the body up with me. Asking one of the other guards to hold him, I climbed my horse before taking the body in my hands once more and as I laid him against me I could feel that his warmth was leaving him. The warmth that had made so many people smile was no more.

“Salvage what you can and meet me at the palace when you arrive. I’ll take the Crown Prince ahead.” My mouth was dry but I kept my head held high using my authority over the others to get them to snap out of their trances.

“Yes, sir.” Grabbing the reins of my horse, I turned it around so that we were now facing the correct direction.

The horse raced on ignoring my tears as they damping the face that was rested against my face as if he was sleeping – the face that had been telling me how much it loved me a few moments ago. I made it to the capital a few days ahead of schedule as I kept pushing my horse not wanting it to slow down or rest. At the edge of the city, I swallowed the lump in my throat – my tears having long since dried – and snapping the reins I maneuvered through the towns people who stared on confusion. Arriving at the palace, I barely stopped my horse before jumping off carrying the body carefully as I was afraid to hurt him even further.

“Hanbin what – What happened?!” My legs trembled at the sight of his Royal Advisor who was approaching us with unreadable emotions.

“T-The Crown Prince is d-dead.” My lips could barely form the words and once they did I kneeled down setting the body on the ground. “We were attacked by thieves. I had warned him to stay in the c-carriage, but he had exited thinking that everything was f-fine. I-I couldn’t reach him in t-time.”

Tilting my head back, I looked towards the sky only to feel water splash against my face. It wasn’t supposed to rain until the next full moon, and here it is on the day that should have not come for many years. Dropping my head, I heard Junhoe’s screams and the many feet that rushed out to see what they had thought was just speculations. The King’s cries were over powering as he took the body from by me hugging it as if it would bring his oldest child back to life, next came his younger brother’s cries as he held the limp hand asking his brother to stop playing. Looking down at my clothing, it was darker than its normal black shade as his blood had seeped through my clothing permanently staining itself there.

By mid-day the word had gotten out, and the towns people were in utter shock, their future King was dead and his brother who knew nothing of the duty was to take over. Chanwoo was to marry the Crown Princess and raise the child of his dead brother as if it was his own. Everything seemed to move fast as they held a public funeral parading the body through the town before taking it to be buried in the family grave. Even though I had failed my duty at protecting him, Chanwoo had made me his personal guard saying that I knew more about the duty than the other guards did. I couldn’t object so accepting with a bowed head I went back to my room staring at the stain clothing that sat atop of one of my many trunks. Looking at my wrist, the bracelet I had thrown on in haste upon receiving it had me smiling like an idiot.

“You were a gift upon this exhausting path of life, and if we’re ever to meet again, I promise to do everything in my power to cherish you as I have in this life. I only want you, my prince; I only crave you.” Whispering the words into the bracelet, I hoped that it would reach him as I made sure that he was buried with it on.

Our meeting was short like a drunken affair, and it was forbidden like adultery, but I’m glad to have met the Prince who had shined a light onto my dark life. A gift, he was and forever will be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hanbok - Traditional Korean Attire  
> Gat - A hat (I can't really explain it but if you look it up you'll get what it is)  
> Chima - A type of skirt worn together with Jeogori  
> Jeogori - A basic upper garment which has been worn by both men and women. It covers arms and upper part of the wearer's body.  
> Baji - Baggy Pants


	3. Life 2: Don't Forget (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set during the Late 1920s - Japan's Invasion of Korea 
> 
> Yunhyeong and Hanbin are both Independance Fighters.
> 
> This chapter is in Yunhyeong's POV and the next one is in Hanbin's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If it is in italics then it is Japanese, regular text is Korean. 
> 
> \- This story is loosely based on the Korean Movie 'Assassination'

Shanghai, 1927

Taking another sip of my coffee, I waited for my cue as the man I was looking for was right in front of me. Hearing a car horn honk three times, I stood calmly making my way over to the older male who seemed to be looking for a good time. I mean why wouldn’t he when this place was crawling with beauty, but none of them were here for the reason I was. They were in it for the money while I was in it for the glory. Smiling, I took a seat next to him before placing my hand on his knee.

“ _I hear you’re looking for some fun, Mister_.” Licking my lips, I scooted closer just to be sure that he had fallen into what I was offering.

“ _You have no decency, I see_.” His laugh was deep, and so was his voice, it made me feel a little sad that someone like him wasn’t fighting for us. “What are you offering?”

“Do you speak Korean?” His eyes lowered as he shook his head which was understandable seeing as how these bastards were only good looking. “ _Then how about I just show you, Mister_.”

“ _I’ll meet you guys later_.” Standing, I grabbed his hand pulling him with me as I made my way towards the room.

Walking down the hall, I made sure to keep some distance between us just in case anyone else decided to impose on my work. Peeking back at him, he was smiling like the idiot he was as he watched me walk; if only he knew what awaited him once we crossed the threshold to my room.

“ _How long have you been in Shanghai_?” Pulling out my room key, I turned towards him with a curious look on my face as if I didn’t already know the answer.

“ _I arrived three days ago from Seoul_.” Raising my eyebrow, I faked interest as I reached out pulling him closer as I allowed him to push me against my door.

“ _Seoul? I’ve never been there but I heard that the coffee there is wonderful. Have you tried it_?” He was about to speak when the door was opened making me take a step in as I pulled him with me.

The door slammed closed and without hesitation I pushed him off of me and into the arms of one of my colleagues. Fixing my clothes, I took off my jacket showing him my guns and as the others made their own weapons known I think he finally realized the danger that he was in. Taking a seat in one of the two empty chairs, I watched as they forced him to sit down before tying his hands to the chair.

“I know you can speak Korean, traitor, so how about we try this again?” Running my hands through my hair, I smiled at the thought of getting rid of him; I enjoyed the sight of watching life leave people like him. “Why are you here? Who sent you?”

“Like hell I’ll tell you. I’d rather die a spy than a traitor to the Empire.” Sighing, I shook my head as these bastards never know when to give up.

“That’s fine by me, but just know that you won’t be missed, Mister.” Pulling out my gun, I pulled the trigger not caring where the bullet landed but as it entered his skull I was kind of happy that I didn’t have to waste anymore bullets.

“Call Yedam, this room is a mess.” Unbuttoning my shirt, I tossed it on the body as he was nothing more than trash as far as I was concerned.

I changed rather quickly as I threw on a fresh set of clothes before making my way downstairs already aware of the fact that they would join me later. It was no secret who sent him but that was something to be discussed with Captain Kim at our meeting in a few weeks. Passing by Yedam, we gave one another knowing smiles but it only last a few seconds as I disappeared into the crowds of people as they wondered around in hopes of finding food and clothing.

“Song Yunhyeong?” I knew better than to turn around s instead I kept walking as to not make myself known. “Shen Yuning?”

Stopping, I turned around finally giving whoever this was my full attention because he might call out my Japanese name next. He was older than I was and by the way he was styled I could tell that he was one of us, but he wasn’t from around here. Seoul, maybe? Manchuria? Shrugging, I waited for him to get closer as his side kick seemed to be having a hard time catching up. He should lay off of the pork, no matter how good it may be. Blinking, I waited for him to show me some identification or just say something in general as it was a little awkward standing in the middle of the road not saying anything.

“Kim Koo has requested your presence to meet him in Seoul at the Rylen at 10 am.” I kept my shock to myself seeing as how he could be trying to trick me. “Here’s your room key, please be safe on your travels.”

Looking at the key in my hand, I looked back up only to see that he had caught a cart and was riding away with a sly smile. This was nothing more than bullshit; plus, he said it out in the open. Rolling my eyes, I tossed the key into a puddle because I didn’t have time for such payed out games. I know a trap when I see it. Continuing on my “walk”, I dipped into an alley as I now had to be sure that no one was following me. Turn after turn, I was quick as I had to be close to my destination by now anyway; turning down another alley, I dipped behind some curtains and waited as the sound of footprints were now apparent as they were frantic in their search for me. One of the pairs of feet stopped right in front of me, but I let him go as he was a fool that fell into nothing more than another trap that would end in him dying for the enemy.

Waiting until they disappeared, I exited the small shop that no one occupied and headed across the small strip of road and into the next one as I greeted the owner. Slipping behind unseen doors, I was met with the sight of many worn out and tired faces but I wasn’t here to see them as instead I was here for nothing more than their leader. Being pointed towards his room, I knocked before entering as I quietly closed the door just in case someone was looking for me; it’ll be hard to figure out which door I went in without hearing which direction the slamming came from.

“Did you carry out your work?” He had gotten older and it has only been a few days; he must be as tired as his men were.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t, sir.” Looking around the room, I noticed that something was a little off but for now it was just something that I’ll keep in the back of my mind.

“Here. I’ll find you if I need you again, Shen.” Bowing my head, I took the small bag off the table before leaving making sure to look over my shoulder as anything was possible.

Seoul, 1927 (3 weeks later)

Stepping off the train, I fixed my hat as no one here knew what I looked like but I’m sure they have heard my name plenty of time-s before. This time I had actually met with Kim Koo as he told me that I would be meeting Kim Wonbin of the Seoul Independence movement for a once in a lifetime opportunity to destroy some of the bigwigs that were so against us, Koreans, having freedom. We’re supposed to be meeting at the Green Leaf Hotel at noon which meant that I had two hours to get a good look around my motherland but seeing as how I don’t really know anyone I think I’ll hang around the hotel. Walking slow, I looked around taking in the air and streets around me as it would be bad to get lost on unfamiliar soil. I greeted those who greeted me, making sure to smile extra wide for those who were good looking (in my book). The hotel was only a few miles from the train station which meant that I could easily escape if the deal wasn’t to my liking.

Entering, I made my way over to the bar as I grabbed a cup of the coffee that has been talked about by everyone that I have come in contact with. Taking a seat at an empty table, I put my sugar into the black coffee and putting it to my lips the taste was still bitter. Shanghai coffee was definitely sweeter with only a small amount of sugar, while this was disgusting. Pushing it away, I looked around noticing a guy that sat behind me with a glass of what looked to be alcohol. Who drinks this early in the day? I guess, I was looking at him for too long as he had turned staring directly into my eyes with a smirk on his face. Rolling my eyes, I turned away from playing with the coffee that I would never drink again.

“Identification Check! All those please have your I.Ds ready for a check.” Looking up, a larger male stood in the hallway pacing back and forth screaming out the order in Korean, behind him stood Empyreal soldiers.

As they made their way around, I slowly put my hand inside my jacket acting as if I was pulling it out only to grip my gun. I was going to pull it out when a body had pressed itself against me holding my arm stilling my movement. His lips were pressed to my ear a small smile playing on them.

“Don’t or else, you’ll get us all killed.” Glancing up at him, his expression had changed from friendly to lust filled.

“Identification?” Turning to look at the man that stood in front of us, his grip had gotten tighter on my wrist.

“Oh, sorry, we left it up in our room. We came down for lunch not thinking to bring it as we were going to go back up and finish what we started.” Pulling me closer to him, I followed along with his words giving the guy a flirty look causing him to shudder a little.

“Okay.” He turned to leave but not before saying what was on his mind. “Freaks.”

Once away from us, he asked the other tables around us and as they all showed some form of identification I held my breath. He might come back, then what? I’ll kill him then. They left allowing me to release it as I pushed the other away from me not liking how close he was. Leaving my gun in its holster, I took my hand out of my jacket setting it on the table.

“What’s your name?” Staring at him, I couldn’t believe how easily he had forgotten what had happened. “Don’t worry they do that a lot – it’s to sniff out Independence fighters as they usually don’t have Japanese identification.”

I was about to say something when he stood heading back to the bar as he grabbed his jacket shouldering it. Watching, I was fascinated as he was weird but I a weird way that was neither bad nor good, then again he could be an enemy.

“I’ll see you later then, Lover.” Gagging, I picked up the bitter coffee taking a sip before dropping it as I needed to head out as well.

Having already paid for my coffee, I left looking around before heading across the street as I entered the Green Leaf. Ducking in between people, I headed up to the floor we were supposedly meeting on and as soon as I stepped on I noticed that some Japs were hanging around. Sighing, I went up two more floors knocking on the door right about it and as I opened I stepped inside. It was a normal thing they did to confuse those who were spy’s and it worked every time. Keeping my coat on, I was ushered to take a seat at this large table and doing just that I crossed my legs leaning back into the seat. Noon had long passed as I sat here waiting and as the sky had darkened I emerged from the bathroom to find the table full and waiting on me. Frowning, I took a new seat liking the cold feeling as it washed the pain from me sitting for so long.

“Good, we’re all here.” Glancing at the other two, I noticed the guy from earlier as he held a cold stare – the person from earlier completely gone. “Shall we get down to business?”

He talked for a long time introducing us and our purpose. He said that we would be farming a group to assassinate an Empyreal General who would be in town for his daughter’s marriage to a Korean politician’s son. Scratching my head, I nodded along to his words as this was indeed a bigwig, but then again the danger was also tremendous. If we failed all of us were dead, even those who are only associated with us, which isn’t a lot of we’re being honest.

“Yunhyeong will be the leader for this mission.” My head snapped up and as we made eye contact he held a small smile.

“Aww, why does he get to be the leader?” We turned to look at the one who had been quietly smoking a cigar this whole time as he was now whining.

“Yunhyeong would you care explain how you became involved with the independence movement.” Shrugging, I stood rubbing my top lip.

“I killed two Japanese Naval Captains who were harassing me, and without hesitation, I mutilated them beyond recognition. I got arrested but escaped and have been on the run ever since, well now I’m a free man.” Kim Goo had paid for my freedom in order for me help him and I agreed as I would have done it a free man or not.

“Never mind, he can be the leader.” Chuckling, I headed towards the window peeking out over the shudder to see that no one was really out.

“How about a picture?” The men that he had brought with him moved to hang a Korean Independence flag behind us as he told us to stand in front of it holding out weapons.

The contract that we had signed and printed with our thumbs was hung around my neck. Staring straight ahead I gave a small smile and as the flash went off the deal was done. We were to kill a traitor and not return until we were victorious.

Seoul, 1927 (1 Week Later)

Working day and night, I came up with a few plans just in case my first one fell through. The General was set to come in three days and we’d be ready for his arrival. I hadn’t seen my colleagues since our first initial meeting which was a week ago – I didn’t particularly mind but we needed to start setting roles and posts. Sending a message for them to meet me at an Independence hideout that is disguised as a bar, I got dressed fixing my button up as the time was approaching. I had sent a coded time for the meet up telling them to meet me 3 hours after the initial time written, just to be safe.

Heading out of my temporary room, I walked with my head down as to not bring unwanted attention to myself. The streets were loud as someone important seemed to be coming down them, so moving out of the way I still ended up bumping into something. Apologizing, I was about to walk off when the person had grabbed my arm pulling me back. Turning to look at them, I was surprised at how much we looked a like – there were a few differences but the general feel was the same.

“ _Chanwoo_? _Darling_?” Yanking my arm away, I ran into the crowd disappearing into an alley as I went around making my way back to where he stood.

“ _I’m fine, I promise. It was a mistake there is no need to go hunting him down, I was the one who stopped him in the first place_.” Listening as they spoke in Japanese, I couldn’t help but stare at them until they walked away.

What the hell was that?

Shaking my head, I turned heading back down the alley until I came upon the bar and entering the music was smooth and not overwhelming but as people stood in the center dancing it had gotten louder. Moving around people, I took a seat at the edge of the bar asking for Soju before turning the stool to glance over the room.

“Sir, your Soju.” Looking back, he slipped me a piece of paper along with my glass that had only a shot glass worth of alcohol in it.

“Thanks.” Slipping the paper into my pocket, I threw back the drink and paying I left going out the building.

Turning the corner, I hid behind a pile of firewood waiting as a pair of feet ran past looking for me. Pulling my gun from the holster, I had a tight grip on it before standing pointing it at the person who had backtracked. The barrel was pressed to the side of their head and I waited with gritted teeth as they put their hands up in surrender – doesn’t mean I still won’t put a hole through your head.

“Leader-nim, you’re a little too trigger happy.” Breathing out a sigh of relief, I lowered the gun putting it back into its holster as it was only Hanbin, one of the two that I was supposed to be meeting.

“What are you doing?” Taking out the paper, I read it as it said to go around the building and enter through the backdoor.

“I was on my way in when I saw your figure running around the building, so I followed.” Rolling my eyes, I grabbed his jacket snatching him inside with me. “Hey, not so rough.”

“Shut up.” Making our way through the maze of a back hallway that this was, we entered through a wooden door that was slightly ajar. “You’re early.”

Letting Hanbin go, I saw Jinhwan, the last of our trio, as he was sitting on a leather couch drinking a dark liquor, cigar still between his fingers. Sitting in the car across from him, I leaned back into it not saying anything more as Hanbin had started up a conversation with the other. Looking at the both of them, I went over their qualifications in my head again as I went over the plan again. Jinhwan, even though small, was an excellent sniper who could smoke anyone under a cart, while Hanbin, who is rather young, is a master when it comes to explosives and disguises. The only flaw with Jinhwan is that he falls in love way too easily and Hanbin has is loud, for no reason.

“Another glass of Soju?” Glancing over the voice at my side belonged to Donghyuk, the owner of the bar, causing me to give him a small smile as he sat in the chair next to mine. “It seems that you’ll need it with these two.”

“I’m going to need something stronger like Opium.” Running my fingers through my hair, I sighed loudly as I would never.

“Don’t go doing drugs on me now.” Snapping his fingers, the bartender from earlier had entered with more liquor. “Oh, this is Jiwon. He’s a Japanese-Korean who is on our side, so put some trust in him.”

Yeah, right.

Seoul, 1927 (3 Days Later)

Jinhwan was posted in the window of the shop across from the hotel that held the wedding where our target was marrying off his child. Hanbin was inside acting like a guest as he would give the signal once he had exited. I was walking around the streets outside playing a customer so that I could shot if Jinhwan had missed for any reason. Glancing up at the window, I couldn’t see him but I knew he was there and that was all that really mattered at the moment. The doors of the hotel had flung open as cheers and congratulations were being given to the lovely couple. Staring at the groom, I couldn’t help but notice that he looked familiar and it didn’t take long before he was turning in my direction thanking the people in front of me.

Our eyes had met and I couldn’t believe it – the groom was that Chanwoo kid for 3 days before. Well, not like I care or anything, his father had to die for our future as a country. Scoffing, a bang had rung out causing everyone to drop to the ground in fear of being next, I followed the crowd not wanting to be suspicious.

“ _The General is shot! Get an ambulance!_ ” The cried of the Japanese had filled my ears as the General laid on the ground already dead.

His blood seeped onto the ground, flowing down the stairs, stopping at the bride’s dress. All those of importance were either taken back inside or pushed into their vehicles that sped off without looking back. Jinhwan was already gone by the time they had thought to go check the shop across the street which meant that Hanbin and I needed to get the hell out of here. Flicking my head at him, he crawled away from the scene leaving me to look around for a new route of escape as my original one was blocked by soldiers. Biting my cheek, I walked slowly down an alley checking around to be sure that no one had followed me.

“ _Check everywhere! We have to find those bastards!_ ” Shit!

Opening a random door, I entered peeking around every corner not seeing anyone – they must have fled in the confusion. Turning to sit down, I was suddenly staring down the barrel of a gun and by the way how this man looked I knew that I was going to do something that I didn’t want to.

“ _Who the hell are you_?” Clapping my hands together, I held them in front of my face as if begging for mercy.

“ _Please, sir. I’m only a lowly prostitute looking for refuge in this time of need._ ” Kneeling, I stared up at him with bashful eyes and a pouty lip hoping that he’d buy it.

“ _What? A prostitute?_ ” He squatted down taking the gun away but his finger was still on the trigger ready to fire at any moment. “ _Hm, I guess, but you’ll have to do something for me._ ”

This is why I work for the movement because of Japanese bastards like him. Standing, he put his crotch in my face and doing what I was once taught, I started to undo his slacks with ease. They gathered around his ankles causing me to lick my lips feigning interest when I would rather be in my room waiting to be called for the pay that was owed to me. Gripping tight on his underwear, I yanked them down free him and like the weird bastard he was, he groaned at the feeling when I haven’t even done anything. With one hand I worked him while I slowly reached for the gun that was stowed away in my waist band. His head was lent back in pleasure not even realizing that his time was up. Placing my own barrel below his belly button, he flinched before leaning forward and with a small smile on my face I pulled the trigger watching as he fell backwards hitting the ground hard.

Wiping my hand on his pants, I went to the window to see that no one was outside, so bowing in thanks to the dead body for his hospitality I spit at him before leaving. I’ve been meaning to use my gun since I got here, it’s good to see that I haven’t become rusty.


	4. Life 2: Don't Forget (2/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of the last chapter.

Manchuria, 1928

The air smelled of dirt and coal, and there is nothing I could do about it. Coughing, I covered my mouth as I moved through the streets looking for the room in the attic of a very expensive building. How he could afford it? I have no idea, but I did have his money burning in my pocket. Finding the building, I entered running up the stairs towards the elevator. It didn’t take long before I was stepping off thanking the person inside before glancing at each door for the room number that I had messily scribbled onto my palm. I should take some of his money for him making me come all the way out here.

Knocking three times, I pushed the door opened to see his back as he was staring out the window with binoculars. Closing and locking the door behind me, I sat down in the chair next to him causing him to look over with a small smile on his face. It’s good to see that he is still in good health.

“What are you doing, Yunhyeong?” Peeking, I tried to figure out what he was looking at but I couldn’t see what it was.

“ _Hyung_ ,” Staring at him in confusion, he put down the binoculars turning towards me. “I’m older than you brat, so call me with some respect. It’s Yunhyeong Hyung – HYUNG!”

“Fine, _Hyung_ , what are you doing?” Rolling his eyes, he held out his hand causing me to dig into my pockets as I produced the money that had brought me here. “I was sad when you suddenly disappeared like that.”

“What about Jinhwan?” Standing, I walked leisurely around the room that was a lot bigger than it seemed.

“They cracked down on Donghyuk’s shop once the mission was over, so everyone fled going who knows where. The last I heard, Jinhwan ran off with that bartender, Jiwon, and Donghyuk had gotten back into the field. He’s currently close friends with the General, who we killed, son.” He hummed as an answered which kind of gave me the feeling that he didn’t really care all that much.

“What about you?” Sighing, I jumped on his bed rubbing my face in the sheets so that he would be forced to clean them.

“Odd jobs here and there. And, you?” Picking up the binocular’s he shook them with a small smile.

“Still killing these bastards.” Rolling over onto my back, I stared up at the ceiling taking in the carvings that they had done to the ceiling – it was beautiful. “How about I treat you to dinner? There’s a good restaurant a few shops down.”

“Wow, Hyung you would really do that?” He came around grabbing my arm pulling me up so that I could go with him to the door.

“Of course, you’re my favorite brat.” My face scrunched up in distaste at the fact that that would be his nickname for me; I’m not even that young.

Heading back outside, the sun was starting to set and without missing a beat we got lost in the crowd of locals. Making it to the restaurant, we got a table at the back not wanting to be where people would see us – just in case. The menu was blocked by others and seeing the look of confusion on my face he offered to order for us as well. Nodding, I stuck my hands in between my legs as the weather has been getting cold as of lately. Two bottles of beer were slammed down on the table causing me to turn and look at the person as it was someone that I’ve become acquainted with through my odd jobs.

“Junhoe? What are you doing here?” His eyes were different from how they normally were as he only stared at Yunhyeong…Hyung. “Last I saw; you were still in Seoul.”

“I heard that they were looking for people to work over here, so I decided to follow the money.” That made sense but this behavior that he was exhibiting just wasn’t right. “Who’s your friend?”

“Oh, this is my favorite Hyung, Yunhyeong.” Smiling, I popped open both of our bottle handing one to Hyung as he gave me a thankful smile in return.

“Mhm, okay. I’ll have your food right out.” Thanking him, he left causing me to follow as he disappeared behind a half curtain that lead to the kitchen.

“He seems delightful.” Laughing, I shook my head throwing the bottle back as the beer here was a little bitter, but I didn’t mind all that much. “On another note, favorite Hyung? It seems that I at least have one friend now.”

“You don’t have friends, Hyung?” He rolled his eyes as he brought the bottle to his lips, his eyes falling to the table in clear discomfort. “You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to.”

“Nah, that part of my life is over, so I shouldn’t really care all that much.” It seemed as if he was reassuring himself by the way how he shrugged only to nod right after. “I’ll tell you something only a few people know about me, okay?”

He leaned in causing me to do the same only for our food to be sat down forcing us apart. Junhoe still had the same look on his face as earlier meaning that someone was bothering him. Ignoring it, he left going to cater to other customers. We ate in silence just wanting to get out of here as it slowly but surely became more packed. Not to mention that everyone in here was carrying weapons – you would have thought a war was coming with how many weapons there were. Paying we left deciding to walk around as the stars were up in the sky looking pretty.

“Oh, yeah, what I was going to tell you.” Licking my lips, I could still taste the food on them – I wiped it away with a rough hand. “I used to be a prostitute in this famous brothel. When Japan invaded, the Japanese had taken a liking to it so its main clientele became over run with those bastards who think that they are above everyone else. That’s how those two Naval Captains came to harass me, I told them that I didn’t want to sleep with both of them at the same time, so they began beating on me. I lost my mind in the heat of the moment and when I had come back to my senses I was laying in between two dead bodies covered in their blood.”

“Wow, Hyung, you’ve had it rough.” Silence had come over us as we walked not wanting to talk about that anymore – that was pretty rough, but it happens. “Oh, I have some news from Donghyuk that he wanted me to relay to you.”

“Are you a messenger, now? I’m not paying you.” We both laughed causing it to fill the air around us.    

“I did hold that job for a short while, but no. Uh, what was it again?” Scratching my head, I stopped really trying to think. “Oh, I got it. Chanwoo has an older brother that’s been missing since his birth – it’s said that the mother gave the child away in the midst of her trying to run from her husband. He was mean, I’m glad we killed him.”

“SHUSH!” Holding my mouth, I had forgotten that no one was supposed to know. “Well, the child might be dead or something by now. Why is this news for me?”

“Because -,” A shot had rung out causing me to drop down out of instinct, but the sound of feet running had me looking around to see – is that Junhoe? “Hyung, are you okay?”

Turning to look at him, he was standing in front of me holding his neck, unmoving only blinking in the dim light of the cinema that we were in front of. Coughing, a liquid had started to spill from his lips and neck getting all over his clothing.

“Hyung? Hyung!” My hands shook as I stood grabbing him before he fell – that son of a bitch! “Come on, talk to me.”

“H-H-Han -,” His lips trembled trying to form the last syllable of my name.

“The reason it is news to you is because you are that child! Your mother gave you to a prostitute in hopes of saving you, s-she wanted you to live a better life. She wanted you to be great.” Gripping his shirt, I shook my head as this couldn’t be happening, not when I’ve just become his friend.

“T-Tha-a-an-,” The hand that was covering the entry point had gone slack, running down his chest, and falling into my lap.

Was he an idiot? How dare he thank me when he’s dying and I can’t save him? The least I can do is bury him in a nice spot, especially seeing as how he’s been nothing but nice to me. Throwing his body onto my back, with great difficulty, I wondered around aimlessly looking for the perfect place. Finding a tree on top of a hill, I climbed it laying his body next to the tree before running down the hill to grab a shovel so that I could start digging.

Once I got a hole that was deep and long enough – I don’t want him to be uncomfortable – I gently laid his body inside of it. Squatting down next to the grave, I took a deep breath and rolling my neck to crack it, I rubbed my shoulders as I’ve been at this for the last few hours. Sighing, I couldn’t believe how peaceful he looked and if he had his signature smile it would have been better.

“Hyung, you’re an idiot.” Should I cry? No, he’d call me a brat and tell me to shut up, so I won’t do that. “You could’ve been powerful, if you hadn’t joined this lifestyle, or at least let me finish my sentence. Jeez! If it had only been a minute later you would have known who you really were.”

The wind had picked up a little causing some of the dirt that I had to the side to fall into the grave. Okay, I’ll shut up. Picking back up the shovel, that I stole from behind someone’s home, I started to cover him in dirt until the grave was full and bumpy. Leveling it, I looked around finding a flower, so sitting it on top of the makeshift grave I looked up at the stars wondering if he’s be able to join them.

“Even though you are an idiot, I won’t forget you. I was your last friend, and you were my favorite, Hyung.” Dusting the dirt off of me, I grabbed my jacket from where I had thrown it on the ground. “I’ll join you soon, Hyung.”

Walking away, I knew that it was only right to seek revenge on that bastard who has killed off a kind soul.

Seoul, 1928 (4 Weeks Later)

Kicking open the door, I held a smirk on my face taking notice of the person I’ve been searching far and wide for. Jiwon had done some work on him, but it was what he deserved. Shrugging off my jacket, I tossed it onto a chair still advancing on him. Coming to a halt in front of him, he was shivering from the cold as he was stripped down to his underwear and covered in what remained of his shower earlier. Laughing, I couldn’t believe that he could live in luxury after what he has done, not to mention that he’s betraying his country by working for the enemy.

“Junhoe, it seems that you’ve had better days, right?” He looked up finally meeting my eyes causing me to wink at him before walking towards the others as they were chatting. “Did he say anything?”

“ _No, his mouth has been shut, tightly_.” I should really learn Japanese because I don’t know what the fuck he just said.

“Jiwon said ‘No, his mouth has been shut, tightly.’” Thanking Jinhwan for the translation, I leaned against the wall noticing that Donghyuk wasn’t saying anything.

“What? Are you feeling conflicted?” Shaking his head, he looked at me making me notice the tears that threatened to fall.

“No, never, it’s just that I didn’t think that Yunhyeong would go out this way. He’s always been the cautious one, even when we first met he wouldn’t shake my hand or drink anything that I gave him. He later told me that I was too friendly, so he thought that I was trying to poison him.” Chuckling, I shook my head as that sounded a lot like him. “The poor boy is a fool for thinking that no one would come after him.”

Placing a cigarette between my lips, I struck a match on the wall and holding it up, I pulled in the smoke before releasing it through my nose. This life wasn't really all that now that I think about it.

“I have to go, Chanwoo and I are supposed to be having a game of ‘Go’.” Nodding, I patted his shoulder as he left causing us to all watch him.

“Let’s get this over with.” Getting off the wall, I went back to the other this time squatting so that he didn’t have to look up at me. “Why did you do it?”

“He had a bounty on his head and the money was good, so why not? I told you that I follow money.” Clenching my fist, I lashed out punching him, hard, making him fall over – his body hitting the wet cold concrete floor. “W-What are you so mad for? Is it because he’s your f-favorite Hyung?”

“Who set the bounty?” A smirk graced his face as he forced himself to sit back up.

“Jung Chanwoo.” I couldn’t breathe not understanding how he could order his own, long-lost, brother to be killed. “Shouldn’t have killed the General, stupid bastard. He loved his father more than he loved himself, and you took that all away from him, so he took the only person who he saw constantly at the scene.”

Standing, I took a deep breath as that son of a bitch would have to be eradicated as well. Snatching my gun from its holster, I pulled the trigger not caring to hear anymore and once he had slumped over I took my coat walking to the other two.

“Clean this mess up, please.” Leaving, I took in the fresh air that I desperately needed.

Why him? Out of all people, why did it have to be Hyung? My heart hurt, squeezing itself hard, and grabbing my chest I went to the side of the building sliding down it. I said that I wouldn’t cry, but I couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“Hyung, I’m so sorry.” Gasping, it was becoming hard to breath. “I’ll get you justice, so that you won’t be forgotten, okay? I’ll do everything in me to make sure that that bastard knows of the pain you felt. The pain that he has never had to experience.”

Jung Chanwoo, your time is slowly ticking away.  


	5. Life 3 - Blue Skies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set during the Korean War (Early 1950s)  
> \- Yunhyeong is a Nurse  
> \- Hanbin is a Soldier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check the end notes for the 1940s - 1950s Slang that Bobby is using. 
> 
> Also, I know that males weren't nurses during War time, but let's just say they got to be because they were in Medical School when the war had came about. 
> 
> Another thing, during this time Busan was called Pusan. 
> 
> Last thing - Italics is English.

Pusan, 1950

Everything had happened so quickly, we managed to get rid of the Japanese and have come to agreement with one another; the world war was over. So, why is the Northern half attacking us? I don’t even remember how it started but they screamed of uniting us together only to kill and use violence in the end. I was drafted in as the number of soldiers was slowly dwindling down, and with my family scared, I thought that it was the least I could do. Now, I’m in the forefront with an assault rifle in my hands with an American next to me who doesn’t speak a lick of Korean.

“Retreat!” My eyes had doubled in size as everyone had started to run, and not knowing what is going on I followed.

A loud boom filled the air causing me to turn around, the wave of heat that I was met with had me falling backwards. Something had slammed into my face and if it wasn’t for the hand on the back of my uniform I would have died right then and there. The voice was deep and unrecognizable and the only thing I could make out was the word ‘okay’ before I was being eloped in darkness. Is this death? No, because I wouldn’t be able to hear my heart beating loudly in my ears, that were ringing loudly. What is this?

Pusan, 1950 (The Next Day)

The feeling of a soft hand as it caressed my own causing me to groan. Opening my left eye, I tried my hardest to open the right one but it just wouldn’t budge. I should calm down; it probably isn’t all that bad. As soon as the thought had past it felt as if I was being run over by a tank which had me letting out a scream that sounded foreign to my ears.

“Sir? Please, calm down.” The soft hand had gripped mine tightly causing tears to fall because this pain was unbearable. “Wait here, I’ll get you something, okay?”

The hand had left my own but it wouldn’t move, not even my fingers nor the rest of my body was. I should have just died if I was going to be unable to move, why didn’t I die? Biting my lip, my neck and left arm was heavily wrapped in bandages, but even with me not being able to move I could feel that my skin was sticking to it uncomfortably. Was it because of the boom?

“Here, it’s a pain killer.” Slightly opening my mouth, the pill slipped past and a cup was pressed to my lips right after.

Swallowing, I choked a little which had me coughing as the hand was gently smoothing down my hair in comfort. Turning my head, I expected a female instead I was met with the smiling face of a male dressed in all white. His teeth were also white, and he was pretty. It was as if I had come in contact with an angel.

“Angel?” The words slipped past my lips causing him to giggle while shaking his head.

“No, I’m Yunhyeong, one of the nurses assigned to this unit.” His words made more sense than my stupid idea of him being an angel. “I’m also the only male in this unit, so you’ll never have trouble finding me.”

“Thank you.” Groaning, I wanted to sit up the only problem was that my body wasn’t listening to me. “W-What happened to me?”

“A bomb had gone off and they said that you had turned around. You have 3rd Degree burns up your left side, and you lost your right eye from flying debris, but don’t worry I’ll make sure that you heal fully, okay?” Shock had now entered my body as I only have one eye, forget about the burns, I only have one fucking eye. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t need your fucking sympathy, just get away from me.” My words were harsh and as he walked away I closed my eye not wanting anyone to see that I had started crying again.

Why was this happening to me?

Pusan, 1951 (3 Months Later)

I’ve spent the last three months in this bed trying to heal from burns that didn’t even hurt anymore. And, even though, I’ve been an asshole to him for these last three months, he’s been by my side helping me with whatever I needed. This is the worst that I’ve ever felt in my life because beside the burns that were going to scar me deeply, I was constantly hurting his feelings when he was only doing his job. He’s truly an angel, which means that I’m going to hell for treating him like this.

“Yunhyeong?” Running from the other side of the room, he stood next to me quickly with a look of concern on his face.

“Yes?” Holding my good arm out, he took it carefully pulling me up until I was sitting. “Is that all?”

“Come closer.” Leaning down, he gave me his ear and even though I felt like od cheesy doing this I knew that I had ruined the end of his year. “Happy New Year.”

“Thank you, Hanbin-ssi.” A bigger smile than the one he normally gives me had covered his face causing me to give him a small one back. “Oh, there’s a Korean-American boy that’s around your age. I think that you two will be good friends.”

Friends? I don’t need friends, but by the excited look that he had I couldn’t just brush him off like that.

“What’s his name?” Reaching for the cup that was always filled with water, I slowly brought it to my lips sipping at the room temperature water.

“Jiwon, but he goes by Bobby.” Nodding, he pointed wards the curtain that had given each person some type of privacy. “He’s next to you. Would you like to meet him?”

Shrugging, he was quick to pull the curtain back revealing a guy with short hair and a bandage that ran across his jaw. His face was neutral as if he didn’t mind that he was laid up in the hospital. Looking him over, he looked fine well besides the bandage on his jaw, but other than that he looked as if he didn’t need to be here.

“Jiwon, this is Hanbin.” His head moved slowly as he turned to look at me and the moment his two eyes met my one, he gave me a huge smile. “I told you he was a looker.”

“Ah, Hyung, he isn’t really looking at anything.” Yunhyeong threw his head back in laughter at the corny joke that was made causing me to shake my head. “ _Anyway, I’m Bobby, how’s it hanging_?”

“How’s what _hanging_?” I was confused at his sudden English, and not to mention that his Korean was horrible.

“Life, _Cube_.” Raising my eyebrow, I didn’t understand what he was saying at all, what is a cube? “Hyung, this cube is busting my gut.”

“You’re in Korea now, so please speak words that I can actually understand!” I didn’t mean to blow up but it didn’t seem to shake him as he started laughing before using his hands to scoot himself up.

“Hanbin, calm down, okay? He’s only talking like how he normally does, so don’t be mad.” Biting my lip, I nodded as he was right, I shouldn’t get mad over something like this. “I have to go give Private Kim his medication, but you two play nice.”

“Private Kim? Who’s that?” Pointing at the short male in the corner who was missing half of his arm, he nodded dropping the conversation. “So, what happened to you?”

“Bomb.” Squinting a little, I tried to shake the memory as it has been hitting me with nightmares these last few nights. “How about you?”

“ _Commie bastard shot my fucking leg off, but I killed him, so it doesn’t hurt that much._ ” He realized that I didn’t hear a word of what he said causing him to laugh as he removed his blanket showing me his leg, that was gone from the knee down. “I got shot, and they had to amputate.”

“Oh, well, I guess were both missing something.” Running my fingers through my hair, I couldn’t smile or laugh at that fact because we were supposed to return home the same way we left.

“Don’t worry about it, bro. Hyung is taking care of us, so it’s all okay.” Staring over to where he stood, I nodded as he was correct – Yunhyeong was taking care of us.

Pusan, 1951 (1 Month Later)

Bobby and I have become good enough friends that we’ve found a common language ground. He even offered to teach me English seeing as how we aren’t really going anywhere for the time being. He was a _cool cat_ , whatever that meant but he used it a lot saying that it was a good thing. Today, I got my bandages changed and as always Yunhyeong was the one to do it. Pulling the curtain closed, I laid down taking in a big gulp of air before releasing it through my nose as this process has gotten easier but the disgusting feeling of skin being pulled away with the bandage wasn’t nice. Other than that, I couldn’t feel the burn at all or the pain that was supposed to come from it. Yunhyeong said that I was lucky to not feel that pain as another soldier named Chanwoo has been suffering through it; he even said that he might not make it another night.

I don’t really know what happened to him, but Yunhyeong never talked about him again which made it safe to say that he didn’t make it. Private Kim, or now known as Jinhwan, was discharged and sent back home seeing as how he had healed up enough to do so, soon Bobby will be leaving as well. He was going back to America where he was sure that his mother would have a heart attack upon seeing him with one and half legs. Laughing at the thought, I was pulled out by the feeling that I had hated so much, I can’t wait until this heals up and scars over.

“Sorry, but grit your teeth, okay?” Nodding, I gritted my teeth until he had taken it all off causing me to look down as the bleeding wasn’t as bad as it normally was. “Oh, it’s starting to heal nicely. That means you’ll only be here for a few more months at most.”

“Mhm.” I had nothing to really say to that as I was excited to go home, but I also didn’t want to leave him.

“I’ll clean it, apply ointment, and then wrap it back up.” That was the normal routine which confirmed to me that I was really going home. “Aren’t you excited that you’ll only be in this hospital bed a few more months?”

“How’s the war?” Licking my lips, they were dry and I knew wetting them was only going to make it worse.

“Negotiations are going on and the war is still pushing forward. We’ve managed to push them back up to the north, a little bit, but it doesn’t mean that they won’t come back down. It can go anyway right now.” Sighing, I lifted my arm up so that he could wrap the bandage around it. “The Americans are trying there hardest, but there is only so much you can do when you’re starting to run out of resources.”

“Do you have family?” Patting my arm, I brought it back down watching as he cleaned up.

“Yeah, I guess. I’ve recently taken a liking to this young boy who is in the children’s ward. He lost all of his family in one night, he watched the whole thing, and got shot but survived, so I’m thinking once this is all over I’ll adopt him.” His normal smile was back forcing the lump that had formed away – I’ll definitely miss his smile. “How about you, Hanbin?”

“Last time, I heard only have my mother and sister left as my dad got killed in the confusion of a raid. That was before I had ended up here, so I don’t really know.” Reaching out, he held my hand intertwining our fingers together giving me a small squeeze.

“Then, do you want to become family with me?” I was speechless as he was only an inch away from my face giving me a smile that held something I’ve never seen before. “We can raise Junhoe together, and take care of a farm. How about it?”

“Uh, Yunhyeong are you – what do you mean?” If I wasn’t already speechless I would have been in this moment as he closed the distance between us placing a small kiss on my lips.

“I like you, Hanbin-ssi.” Letting my hand go, he collected his tray of garbage before opening the curtain leaving with a wink.

Staring at the peeling ceiling, I tried to find my breath as I was just kissed by an angel. Humming had filled my ears causing me to turn my head to see that Bobby was smirking at me, he must have heard everything.

“If he isn’t _Apple Butter_ , then I don’t know what he is?” My face scrunched up in disgust as apple butter sounded down right disgusting. “No – never mind. So, what are you going to say?”

“Huh? About what?” Blinking in confusion, he waved his hand around motioning to what had just happened. “Oh, I don’t know. What should I say?”

“I can’t tell you that, but I can say that he really likes you, so I think it’s best if you tell him your true feelings. Anything other than that _ice it._ ” Nodding, I didn’t understand how I could ice my words, but the rest of it was good advice. “Hey, did you meet the new nurse?”

“New nurse? Who?” As soon as the words left my mouth, the door opened revealing another male with black hair that bounced when he walked – he was also dressed in all white with a small hat on. “We have two male nurses in this unit now?”

“Hell yeah, and he’s a looker, I think I’m going to lay some _Apple Butter_ on him.” His smile was greasy but it worked for him. “I think his name is Donghyuk, maybe he’ll go back to America with me.”

“You do that.” I had nothing to say to that as that was his plan and if it went through or not was also entirely up to him.

Sighing, I turned away from him as he called the nurse over to him causing me to lean over as I closed the curtain to give them some privacy, even though that wasn’t really all that possible. I do like Yunhyeong, but with everything going on I never thought that anything would come out of it. We’re in the middle of a war! Which means that either one of us could die whenever someone feels like dropping another bomb or coming in here with guns drawn. Then this should be the perfect time to let my feelings be known, right? I might die tomorrow which means that we should let these feelings be know.

Pusan, 1951 (1 Week Later)

I gave myself enough time to think on my feelings, and I have finally come to the conclusion that I would let him know. Night had fallen by the time I had come up with this, so waiting as he checked on his last person, I called him over. Opening the curtain, he closed it behind him before turning on the small lap that sat on the side table that I never used. As his smiling face light up, I scooted over patting the bed so that he could lay down next to me which had him turning off the lamp. Walking around the bed, he got in using my arm as a pillow causing me to smile down on him.

“What do you think you’re doing calling a nurse into your bed?” Whispering, laughter was laced into his words and if those around we weren’t asleep I would have laughed out loud.

“What are you doing getting into it?” Pulling on my white beater, he played with it a little. “I like you, too.”

“Oh, I thought this was something important.” Scoffing, I couldn’t believe that those words had just left his mouth after I had found the courage to say them. “I’ve been known that you liked me, that’s why I confessed, idiot.”

“Who said that I liked you before now?” Lightly punching my side, I moved away a little after as he was starting to become a violent person.

“You always looked at me as if I was angel of some sort, and not to mention the obvious staring and that fact that you were always calling me for stupid stuff.” Okay, I admit that I did call him for silly things and that I stared a lot, but that doesn’t mean that I liked him, right? “Well, it doesn’t matter now that we’re on the same page.”

“Mhm.” Angling my wrist, I patted his head knowing that he would have to leave after a few minutes.

I wish that we could stay this way forever.

Closing my eyes, a ticking had sounded but I ignored it thinking that it was a clock. It wasn’t until Bobby threw open the curtain that I had jumped up staring at him as he held the same look of concern. We didn’t have a clock in this room. His greasy smile was back as he noticed that Yunhyeong was next to me causing me to give him one back as Donghyuk was next to him. Time seemed to stop before accelerating at 2x it normally speed. The sound had me falling over to cover Yunhyeong but it wouldn’t have saved us as the whole building shook before it came crashing down on us only a few seconds later. Kissing him, we both smiled before we were crushed to death under the weight of the concrete that had held this building together.

At least, I let him know my feelings. At least, we died together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cube - Normal Person (Basically a square)  
> Busting A (My) Gut - Laugh Very Hard  
> Cool Cat - A Good/Admirable Person  
> Apple Butter - Smooth Talk (So he's implying that Yunhyeong is a smooth talker)  
> Ice it - Forget it or don't do it


	6. Life 4: Lonely (1/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set during the Late 1960s   
> \- Yunhyeong is a Farm Boy (so to say)  
> \- Hanbin is an Aspiring Artist and Mountain Dweller

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a two part story, so that you can get Hanbin's and Yunhyeong's point of views. All I have to say is that it gets crazy in the next chapter.

Gangwon-do, 1969

“Yunhyeong, be careful not to step in the crops again!” Smiling, I grabbed the packages that she wanted me to put in the post box in the middle of town.

“I won’t, Halmeoni.” Running out the door, I jumped over the flowers at the end of the house that lead to the road.

The air was fresher than it had been a few days ago, which was telling me that Spring was on the way. But that also meant that I was going to be worked until I couldn’t stand anymore as the crops will be ready for harvesting any minute. Skipping down the road, I waved at the family next door causing their youngest child to give me a big teeth missing grin. It’ll take a minute before I get to two which meant that Halmeoni won’t be worried if I come back late. I think I’ll take the mountain route back.

A good thirty minutes later I had walked into greeting the shop workers and whatnot as everyone seemed generally happy to see me. Going up to the box, I stuffed the packages inside listening as they fell to the bottom on top of other packages and envelopes. Dusting my hands as if I did something, I looked towards the bakery to see that the auntie was waving me over. Walking over to her, she told me to wait a minute.

“Here, enjoy these with your grandmother, okay?” Handing me a bag full of fresh bread, I smiled thanking her as she was so kind. “You’re such a good boy, I wish Chanwoo was more like you.”

“Umma!” The boy that was a few years younger than me came out tucking in his shirt with a look of distaste on his face.  “What are you looking at Farm Boy?”

“Uh, nothing. I have to go, see you later, Mrs. Jung.” Turning, I took off not wanting to be in Chanwoo’s presence for much longer as he was mean.

Popping a piece of bread in my mouth, I headed into the forest with a smile as I just loved to be surrounded by nature. The green of the trees, the different hues of brown that were the tree trunk, and just the smell of the woods and the freshness of the mountain. Looking around, I noticed a messy head of hair that peeked just over this bush and out of the pure curiousness I climbed up the mountain towards it.

“Excuse me? What are you doing?” His head suddenly popped up scaring me and as if it was a dream, I lost my footing causing me to tumble down the path I just climbed up.

Covering my head, I fell onto my back hard causing me to groan in pain – I think I landed on a rock. My eyes were closed but I could hear the person as they ran down the side of it sliding to a stop next to me.

“Are you okay?” Picking through my eye, I sucked in my lips to stop my laughter as he looked as if he’d been through a coal mine. “Yah! Can you hear me? Oh, no, what am I going to do? I’ll be thrown away for life because I accidentally killed a person.”

“You didn’t kill me, idiot.” Using my elbows, I sat up enough to grab the rock causing me to throw it away from me. “The bread?”

Pushing myself so that I was fully sitting up, I looked at the ground to see the scattered pieces that laid all around us. Sighing, I couldn’t help but pout as Halmeoni didn’t get a chance to taste any. I should have taken the regular route. Glancing at him, his eyebrows were furrowed in concerned causing me to whine a little exaggerating the pain more than it actually was – I might as well use this to my full advantage.

“Do you need help? Anything? I’ll do anything, just don’t tell anyone that I almost killed you.” Smiling, I fully sat up – holding my back a little because he fell right into my trap.

“Anything?” Nodding, I crawled around picking up the bread, throwing it back into the bag, so that it can be given to the animals. “Well, until my back is fully healed, you’ll help me on Halmeoni’s farm, okay?”

“Wait – a farm? I’ve never been on one -,” He started ramble causing me to put my hand over his lips to shush him.

“You’ll be taught everything you need to know. Do you have a job?” Shaking his head, I sighed a little as I couldn’t believe I tricked a jobless bum. “Then, I’ll talk to Halmeoni about paying you for your work. Now, let’s go.”

Walking slow, he walked calmly next to me clutching a bundle of papers with a pencil behind his ear. He doesn’t seem to be around here as I’ve never seen him in town or anything, and I know everyone, even those that seem to hate me (cough - Chanwoo - cough).

“Oh, yeah, what were you doing up there?” He stopped causing me to do the same as I stared upon him in wonder. “We’re you _peeping_?”

“N-No! I-I was drawing.” It funny watching him be flustered – he was going to be a delight to have on the farm. “Do you want to see?”

Shrugging, I went closer to him as he flipped over the bundle of papers to show me a bunch of different drawings of trees and other things that ran across the forest floor. He was good and by the sudden confidence boost from my compliment he flashed me a shy smile. Snaking my arm into his, I pulled him along as we didn’t want to be late; Halmeoni was making her delicious Kimchi Stew for dinner and it would be nice if he could taste it. Skipping, he followed causing me to look back every so often to see a look of confused and shock – I broke my cover. We made it just by nightfall and stepping over the flowers, I stopped him at the door suddenly remembering that I never got his name.

“What’s your name?” Tapping my foot, I waited but he seemed to zone out as he stared at me with this weird look. “Hey, peeper? What’s your name?”

“I-I’m not a peeper and it’s Hanbin.” Smiling, I pushed open the door pulling him along with me only to see that Halmeoni was sitting in front of the TV watching her dramas.

“Halmeoni?” Looking away from the TV, she chanced us a glance before going back to what she was watching. “This is Hanbin and he’s going to help us with farm work for a few days. Well, we’ll be in my room.”

“Just be careful, and I hope you didn’t go through my crops again!” Laughing, I rushed down the hall with him sliding open my door dropping the bread by the threshold before stepping inside.

“Uh, you can stay in my room seeing as how I don’t think the shed is all that comfortable.” Scratching my neck, I looked around for clothing for him to wear to sleep. “You stink, so we should get you a bath. I’ll go warm up the water.”

Sliding past him, I pushed him to sit down as he was making me uncomfortable by standing in the threshold of my room like that. Grabbing the bread, I headed back outside to where the ox rested, so squatting in front of him I gave him a few pieces of the bread watching for a few seconds as he munched on it. Patting his head, I ran back towards the house starting a small fire to warm the water up on. Taking the bathing bucket, I moved it by the fire so that he wouldn’t be cold while washing and taking a smaller one I filled it with the water from the hose before running towards the fire as I sat it in the fire until it almost boiled. I did that for a while before calling Hanbin to come out so that we can get him looking like one of us country folk.

“Strip and sit.” Covering himself, I laughed while waving him over as he could keep on his underwear. “Take off your shirt and pants, but keep your underwear on, it’s still too chilly for you to be fully naked. While you do that, I’ll get you a towel and new clothing, and underwear.”

I was excited and I don’t even know why. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m talking to someone around the same age as I who isn’t a total snob just because they have family that live in Seoul. Jinhwan Hyung, I’m talking about you! Digging through my drawers, I found everything that I need even grabbing him some soap as water wouldn’t be enough with all the dirt on him. Coming back out, he was in the water sinking in it a little and if the small sighs weren’t an indicator to how good he was feeling then I don’t know what is. Sitting the clothes and towel on the porch, I took the soap heading back over to him as I should at least give him a hand.

“Hanbin, what were you doing in the mountains? Besides drawing that is.” Wetting the soap, I lathered it in my hands before putting my fingers in his hair as I started to get the chunks of dirt and twigs out.

“My parents didn’t want me to draw, so I ran away wanting to follow my dreams instead of always sticking with theirs. I’ve been walking from one side of the mountain until here staying at the abandoned homes up there and eating what the mountains produced. It’s a worry-free and peaceful life.” Humming, I continued to scrub him not understanding how someone could become this dirty even if they lived in the mountains.

“Why didn’t they want you to draw?” He drew his knees to his chest sighing loudly which had me grabbing the soap again as I started working on his arms.

“They said that it was a waste of time and that I’d never get a stable job doing it, but did you see the artwork for that movie that just came out? Yeah, it’s a painted over photo but that is a job that I’m willing to do.”

“I heard that because such concentration goes into it that they get paid pretty decently.” His arm came out of the water as he pointed at nothing in particular causing me to laugh as he was a weird one. “Well, work hard and prove them wrong, okay?”

“Okay.” It was silent after as I watched him clean the rest of his body – I looked away when he dug into his underwear. “Aren’t you afraid that I’m going to rob you guys, or kill you in your sleep?”

Snorting, I shook my head taking the soap from him again as I began to wash his face a little harsher than normal. We need to have all the dirt gone.

“By the way how you freaked out earlier, it is safe to say that you’re not capable of murdering anyone.” He splashed some water at me as a small smile came onto his face at the earlier memory.

Filling the bucket again, I dumped it on his head causing him to almost jump out of the bucket at the coldness of the water. Apologizing, he looked like a fish when you first catch it. I kept doing it until there was no more soap in his hair and the water was almost fall out of the bucket. Walking away, I grabbed the towel from him and turning around he stood in front of me dripping wet like a dog. The only difference was that his business was all out as it showed through his used-to-be white underwear. Screaming, I covered my eyes – I’m not going to lie, I peeked a little – waiting until he covered himself up and handing him the towel I couldn’t meet eye contact with him.

“A-After this I’ll cut your hair, okay?” Going around him, I tipping the bucket over causing the water to put out the fire as it ran over the wood cooling it off.

What am I doing bringing a stranger into my home? And not just any stranger, one who’s lived in the mountains for who knows how long. Don’t be concerned about it, you’re just being a good Samaritan. Yeah, I’m doing it out the kindness of my heart and nothing else.

Gangwon-do, 1969 (1 Month Later)

The seasons have changed which meant that we’ve been out in the field more harvesting vegetables and other crops to sell down at the market. Halmeoni is working Hanbin and I to the bone, but I don’t mind that much as Hanbin is good company to keep. I had to teach him how to dress in this part of town as you had to have the straight leg faded pants look with a tucked in shirt that’s either long or short; I also, styled his hair in a bowl cut as I had to cut more than I wanted – it was a mess.

Sighing, I stood causing my back to pop from the sudden movement. We’ve been bent over for the last few hours harvesting potatoes and it seems that there are more than there where last year. Wiping my sweat with the back of my dirty cotton glove, I stared up at the sky to see that the sun was showing us no mercy.

“Halmeoni can we please take a break? I’m dying from thirst and hunger.” Smacking my back, I jumped away from her next hit as she was a violent person.

“Why can’t you be more like Hanbin? He works without complaining. It isn’t even like you’re even doing anything hard.” I was rendered speechless at her harsh words causing me to look at Hanbin but he only shrugged – traitor. “But since you two are working diligently, I’ll go slice up some watermelon. That doesn’t mean to stop working.”

Smacking my head this time, she stepped over the crops that we still had to harvest causing me to stick my tongue out at her back. This farm would die if it wasn’t for us. Glaring at Hanbin, I got back to work with a pout on my face because they’ve been plotting against me since the beginning.

“Yunhyeong Hyung?” My head popped up at the voice causing me to smile as I waved at the guy on the side of the road with his bike. “I see Halmeoni is working you hard, again.”

“Of course, Donghyuk. She’s a mean old lady.” We both laughed and it was in that moment that I realized that Hanbin was with us. “Oh, Donghyuk this is Hanbin, my new friend.’

“Hello!” Donghyuk bowed almost falling off his bike before steading himself which had me chuckling only to see that Hanbin wasn’t really speaking. “I have to go, or else Noona will throw a fit. It was nice meeting you Hanbin.”

“Bye!” Waving goodbye, I watched as he disappeared down the road towards his home that was a few minutes away.

“That’s Donghyuk, his family owns the stationary supply store in town. We’ve been close friends since we were little. He’s really nice – I think you’ll like him once you get to know him.” He stared at me before turning away as he went back to digging up his patch of potatoes. “I have more friends that I’d like you to meet once we go to the market later.”

“Mhm.” Where is this sour attitude coming from?

Shrugging it off, I continued to work waiting on the call that was sure to save us from this heat even if it’s only for just a little bit. We’ve been working since before day break and I would rather be sleeping, but since I graduated there seems to be only more work to do. Once the call came, I ripped off my gloves and dropping my basket on the ground I ran at fully speed jumping over the crops as to not get yelled at. I couldn’t stop myself causing me to run into the porch which had me tumbling onto it as I hit my forehead on the wall. Rubbing the pain area, I held back my tears ignoring Halmeoni’s chiding voice as she called me and idiot, along with a few other things.

“Are you okay?” Shaking my head, I turned towards Hanbin with my arms crossed over my chest as it was surely red. “Come closer.”

Leaning in a little, he kissed it causing me to jump back a little surprised at the sudden action that had him laughing. Picking up a slice of watermelon, he sat down chomping on it as if nothing had happened. Mountain dwellers are weird. Taking a slice for myself, I bit into it spitting the seeds out at him. They stuck to his always wet skin with ease which had started a fight between us as we were now eating to spit the seeds at one another.

“You two stop playing around and get back out here!” Swallowing what was in my mouth, seeds and all, I coughed a little as she was no fun.

No fun at all.

Gangwon-do, 1969 (2 Weeks Later)

Relaxing on the porch, I had my legs in the air snapping pictures of my feet as I tried to figure out how this camera fully worked. It was gift from my Uncle – he’s been working in German since the Korean War trying to make some extra money, and since he saved up more than enough he brought me this camera. He left quickly, though, said he had to get back to work and his family over there. A shadow was suddenly over me, blocking the sun, causing me to turn to see that Hanbin was looking at me with a funny look. Moving the camera, I snapped a quick picture which had him flinching from the sudden flash.

“What’s that?” Rolling over onto my stomach, I leaned my head on my hand staring up at him.

“My Uncle stopped by when we were in the market and left this gift for me. It’s a German camera” Gasping, I sat up quickly looking around as I wanted to take some pictures. “Want to take some photos with me?”

“Uh, sure?” Smiling, I caught a glimpse of Donghyuk walking along the side of the road with some I’ve never seen before by his side.

“DONGHYUK!” They both turned to look at me causing me to wave them over so that they could be in the photos as well. “Don’t step in the crops, or the flowers!”

“I know, I know!” Giggling, I got off the porch grabbing Hanbin bringing him with me to meet them halfway. “What has you so happy today?”

“I got a camera.” Showing it to him, he flipped it around with pure excitement on his face. “Um, who’s this?”

“Oh, this is Jiwon.” A blush and shy smile had come onto his face at the mention of the other who it was clear wasn’t from around these parts. “He’s extended family to the Kim’s down the road, and has recently moved here from Seoul.”

“Woah, Seoul! Do you see famous people all the time?” They all laughed at my curiosity but I was serious never having left the country side. “I’m serious. Have you ever seen Nam Jin in person? I love his song ‘My Heart Aches’.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen him from afar, but I haven’t talk to him or anything like that.” Wow! That’s so cool. “Well, I’ll probably never see him again seeing as how I’m going to spend the rest of my life in this town.”

“Eh, it isn’t that bad once you get used to it. Isn’t that right, Hanbin?” Glancing at the other, he nodded causing me to poke his cheek as he was being cute. “Enough about that, let’s take some pictures together.”

Ushering everyone over to the small clearing before you get to the actual crops, and calling Halmeoni I asked if she could take a group photo for us. It took a while to teach her how to use it but once she got it we all smiled while trying out different poses. When she finally got tired of doing that, I said that I’d take a few photos of Donghyuk and Jiwon – it was clear that he liked him and this was the perfect opportunity for them to cherish the innocent nature of their love before it gets tainted. They were shy at first causing me to force them together until they were in one another’s personal space smiling like idiots.

Our turn came soon after, and seeing as how I was more out there, I hugged Hanbin wrapping my arms around him causing him to lean back a little. Staring up at him, we both smiled only to be blinded by the flash a few seconds later. Breaking apart, I wanted to do a pose I saw in this magazine, so telling him to stand up straight I went behind him leaning out to the side laughing as I put up the Victory (peace) sign. He shyly put up one as well causing Donghyuk to laugh as he kept saying that it was cute. Snapping a few more after that, we all sat on the porch together talking about nothing much and as Donghyuk and Jiwon had to leave we waved goodbye to them.

“I’ll go tomorrow and see if anyone can develop these in town, but if not do you want to take a trip to the next town over with me?” Moving, I sat down on the step in front of him leaning my head back to look at the face that he’s been hiding for the last few minutes. “Hanbin! Yah, peeper!”

“I want to paint you.” He held a gentle smile and semi-wet eyes as he stared down on me probably worried that I would say no.

“Wow, really?! I’ve always wanted to be drawn, or painted, and you’re really good so I think it’ll come out amazing.” Taking the camera from my hands, he brought it up to his face snapping a picture that I wasn’t prepared for.

“Yeah, it’ll be amazing.” Smiling up at him, I was more surprised by the way how he leaned down kissing me – I didn’t mind, at all, but it was still surprising. “I’ll make sure it’s good enough to be a national treasure, okay?”


	7. Life 4: Lonely (2/2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of last chapter.
> 
> Hanbin's POV

Gangwon-do, 1969 (2 Weeks Later)

I want him. I want him more than I wanted to paint and I wanted to do that more than anything.

After telling him that I wanted to paint him, I kissed him out my own selfishness and the crazy thing about it was that he didn’t seem to mind at all. He even went out of way to buy me all new supplies and a canvas that was way larger than I needed, but I didn’t mind as long as he didn’t mind. The storage room that was usually stocked with old useless things was cleaned out and arranged for me to work in peace. It made me fall for him even more. Just the fact that he cared enough about me riled me up for some odd reason, and then there was the smile that he gave me whenever he held my hand or talked to me in general. I want to make him mine, so that he’ll never give that kind smile to anyone again.

“Are you done yet? My back is starting to hurt.” Blinking, I looked at the canvas in front of me to see that I had finished the general sketch.

“Uh, yeah.” Sitting my pencil down, I began to mix the paint as I wanted to finish it before his birthday came – I was going to gift it to him. “You can lay down or something.”

“Hanbin, do you want to go somewhere with me once you finish?” Nodding, I checked to make sure that the skin tone was correct before putting it onto the canvas that held his child-like smile. “Oh, before dinner, let’s go on a walk, okay?”

Nodding, again, he came over to me patting my head only to leave saying that he’d give me time to myself to concentrate. Sighing, I continued to fill in his neck and the small sliver of skin that I could fit under his sleeves. Filling in his shirt color, it changed all the time but he normally wore this green and yellow shirt that complimented his skin amazingly well. I’ll start shading and highlighting when we come back from our walk. A knock on the door had me turning around to see that he was peeking his head in with a wide grin.

“Are you ready?” Sitting the brush down, I stood heading towards him as I needed something to wipe my hands on. “I’ll bring you a towel.”

Taking off down the hall and into the bedroom, I stepped out closing the door behind me as I leaned against it waiting on him to come back. When he did, he tripped a little causing me to reach out as I caught his arms glad that he didn’t injure himself. Letting him go, he stood up straighter handing me the towel and taking it I cleaned my hands throwing it into the room before grabbing his hand so that we could go. We were walking around aimlessly – our hands still tightly joined together – only to be interrupted by some brat on a bike.

“If it isn’t Farm Boy, and some loser, I don’t understand how anyone would want to be friends with someone who smells like dirt all the time.” His words were harsh as he circled around us before stopping in front of his with this mocking look on his face.

“Why don’t you just leave me alone, Chanwoo? Don’t you have skirts to chase?!” Yunhyeong swatted at him but he only laughed looking us over.

“It’s better than chasing pants.” Balling up my fist, I was going to go after him but he rode away fast, his laughter trailing behind him.

Throwing his hand out of mine, I stormed off because he should have defended us or at least said something. No, he just stood there with that stupid grin of his and allowed us to be talked down on. No, Hanbin, calm down. It isn’t going to be a repeat of last time – I won’t hurt him like how I hurt them. Grabbing my head, I gripped my hair going towards a tree I thought about bashing my head onto it but thought against it as the tree never did anything to me. No worries, I’ll get him back for his words then he’ll never be able to speak such nonsense again. 

“Hanbin!” Fixing my face, I calmed down walking away from the tree to meet him with a smile. “Why did you run off? Is it because of what Chanwoo said? Well, don’t worry about him, he’s been that way since forever.”

Giggle while you can, yes, laugh while this memory is still funny.

“We should head back. Halmeoni must be done cooking.” Walking ahead of him, I clasped my hands behind my back not wanting to hold hands with him anymore.

“Binnie? BinBin?” Stopping, I gave him a stern look not liking the nicknames but he only smiled putting his arm in my own. “Don’t be mad, okay?”

Rolling my eyes, I was about to walk away again but I was stopped by the feeling of his lips on my cheek. Did he just kiss me? Turning my head, slowly, he waited until we were fully looking at one another before kissing me again – this time on the lips. Why did he like doing this to me? He’s always making my emotions go up and down like the waves in the ocean. I can’t hate him, and that’s the whole problem.

“Now, there’s that cute smile. You’re so handsome, BinBin.” Squeezing my face, he shook it with puckered lips causing me to wonder if I was a child. “Let’s go.”

Dragging me behind him, he ran as if he was being carried with the slight breeze and I couldn’t help but stare at him as he did so. Why was he so enticing? Making it home, we let one another go to eat causing his knee to touch mine ever so often which had my heart racing. Halmeoni stared at us with this weird look – she knew and it was clear that she didn’t like it. Scooting away from him a little, I ate quickly wanting to get back to my painting. That was the only way for them to understand that nothing was wrong with our love, it was innocent and pure, no matter how much we’re not supposed to. Slamming my chopsticks down, I thanked her for the meal running out of the room and down the hall towards the only room I felt safe in.

Why was everyone against me? WHY?!

“Hanbin, are you okay?” Everyone, but him.

“Yeah, I just suddenly got an idea, so I wanted to fill it in before I forgot about it.” He nodded closing the door behind him leaving me alone.

All night and into the early morning hours, I continuously ran my brush over the canvas with light and harsh strokes as something was wrong. It wasn’t how I wanted it to be. It wasn’t a masterpiece. Groaning in frustration, I threw the brush down going towards the corner and sliding down the wall, I put my head in my hands rocking back and forth because he’ll surely come to hate me once he sees that I can’t keep my promise. It was perfect before, but now it’s missing something. What the hell is it missing?!

“Ow.” Jumping, I spun around to see that he was standing in the doorway holding his finger that was bleeding. “I brought you some fruit seeing as how you’ve been working hard all night, but I’m as clumsy as ever.”

Rushing towards him, I took the plate and knife sitting it on the ground before grabbing his fingers as this was what I was missing. It wasn’t him because he wasn’t a part of it, and neither were the things that he cherished or hated. Wiping the blood away, I bite my lip watching as the small bead came back up to the top before popping as it ran down the side of his finger. Going towards the canvas, I smudged the blood that I had taken over the painted corner of his mouth dragging the neutral pink tone with it.

“Woah, it looks good, but why did you smudge the lips?  Do I have something on my face?” Laughing, I shook my head as he was just like how Chanwoo said he was – he knows nothing but this small town, farm life.

“No, even if you did, you would still look as beautiful as you do now.” A blush came to his cheeks and into his mouth went the bleeding finger. “D-Did you develop those photos yet?”

“Oh, no! I forgot, uh, eat some fruit I’ll be back once I’m done.” Smiling, I waved goodbye to him as he ran out tripping over his feet as always.

Cracking my neck, I left the fruit where it sat slowly heading out behind him as I needed to pay Chanwoo a visit. I needed him to complete my masterpiece – it’ll really be a national treasure.

Gangwon-do, 1969 (3 Weeks Later)

Chanwoo colored the sky. Donghyuk and Jiwon colored the clouds. Jinhwan colored the strips in his hair. But it still wasn’t complete? Who am I missing? I need just one more before I add a little bit more of him and myself.

“Hanbin! Did you hear about what happened to Donghyuk and Jiwon?! It’s so scary – to think that our little town would have this many deaths in such a sort amount of time. They said that they committed suicide because their families didn’t want them to be together. My poor little Dongie.” Tears ran down his face as he relayed the news that I already knew to me.

“Come here.” Putting down the board that I kept my paint on, I patted my knee causing him to plop down on it. “I’m so sorry that this has happened to you, especially after what happened to Chanwoo, I know that this must be hitting you hard.”

Nodding, he turned around hugging me, more tears spilling onto the clothes that I had now made my own. Wrapping my arms around him, I patted his back in comfort glad that his head was in my neck or else I wouldn’t be able to hid my smile. He’s slowly becoming all mine meaning that no one can take him away from me. No one can ruin this love that we have made for ourselves.

“Yunhyeong?! Junhoe is here!” My smile fell at the unfamiliar name and I couldn’t believe how fast he jumped up running out of the room.

Silently following behind him, I saw someone that I used to know and as our eyes locked I tilted my head in a shallow greeting. What the hell was he doing here? I watched as they hugged one another crying over their lost friends that they barely knew. Just because you grow up with someone it doesn’t mean that you truly know them. He finally noticed me after what felt like forever causing him to come to me with a smile as he took my arm bringing me into the sun that shone down on us harshly. Licking my lips, I stuck my hands into my pockets not wanting him to notice how they were balled up, and not to mention my veins were prominent.

“Hanbin this is Jinhwan’s brother, Junhoe. He moved from the country to Seoul because he got accepted into this good school. We grew up together along with Donghyuk and Chanwoo.” His voice shook as he said the names which had my eyebrows jumping but I concealed them under my bangs.

“You must be the mountain guy that Hyung said was interesting. He said that you’re a good drawer.” Taking his extended hand, I gripped it tightly shaking it not understanding how he doesn’t know who I am. “Actually, I think I saw you somewhere before, did you use to live in Seoul by the Han River?”

Taking my hand back, I scratched my neck as he was quite quick even though he didn’t seem like it. Nodding, I gave him a tight smile which had his own flattering which was a pretty sight. I think he’s the last thing that I’m missing.

“I’m going to get back to my painting, call me if you need anything.” Patting the small of Yunhyeong’s back, I walked back into the house softly closing the door behind me as I picked up the knife that I’ve kept hidden in an old drawer.

Junhoe, you should have kept your thoughts to yourself. I think I’ll use you to color the tears that’ll fall from his eyes.

Gangwon-do, 1969 (1 Week Later)

It was almost done. I only need him now, but he’s been avoiding me this last week. I don’t know why and it’s irritating me. Why is he turning his back on me? What have I done to have him give me this coldness when I’ve only given him warmth? No matter, today, I’ll get him and finish the painting without fail. I’ll gift it to his Halmeoni before following the same path that he has set for himself. If only he loved me without worries – I’ll worry about everything, so why does he have to worry about useless things?!

Taking a deep breath, I stumbled a little bit causing me to hold my head as this has been worrying me, but I know it’ll all be worth it in the end. We’ll always be together in the end.

“Yunhyeong?” Peeking into his bedroom, he was leaned against the wall reading a book – he was so smart. “Do you want to take a walk with me?”

Looking up at me from his book, he gave me a hesitant smile before standing as he came to me taking my hand like nothing had happened. Squeezing his hand, I smacked my lips only for a smile to follow after. I’d should only keep good memories, or else my painting will not be as great as it is destined to be.

“I know the New Year is still a few months away, but I’ve been meaning to ask what you’ll want to do when we reach the 70s? Woah, now that I say it, we’re getting old.” Snorting, his laughter filled the road that we walked on into the mountain that held water on the other side.

“Don’t worry, we won’t make it.” Mumbling the words to myself, I laughed a little as if I was laughing at his words. “So, how do you like the painting so far?”

“I love it. The different types of red that you use to accent the spaces that you filled with the regular colors is beautiful. If I’m being honest, I think the painting looks better than I do.” Shaking my head at his words, I couldn’t believe that he would think so highly of my painting to discredit himself.

“The real thing is the best.” Giving him a thumbs up, he laughed slightly bumping our bodies together as if he was shy by my words. “Did you know that there’s a waterfall just beyond this point?”

“Not really, I’ve never been this deep into the mountain. Do you know where it leads too?” Nodding, I pointed in the direction of the port that gave us our fish and other underwater creatures.

“It rushes down, and you’ll fall straight into a lake that’ll carry you into this small river that leads out by the port, so in the end you’ll end up by the shore.”

“Wow, have you’ve done it before? You seem to have a lot of knowledge on it.” I didn’t answer instead continuing forward as I already had everything set up for our arrival.

Making it to the top, I let his hand go allowing him to roam past the trees the hid the waterfall from view but the sound of water rushing past was loud. Taking a deep breath, I took one last look at his smiling figure and once I had internalized it, I grabbed him throwing him to the ground. Pulling out my knife, I stabbed him in the back of his thigh cutting the fabric and flesh before sticking a bucket under it to catch the red that he was so in love with it. He thrashed around and screamed for me to get off him but with how far up we were no one would be able to hear him unless they were in the mountain, which wasn’t likely as no one liked coming here. Once the bucket was filled enough, I moved it flipping him over, straddling his waist, I held his arms down staring at the tears that ran down his face.

“Yunhyeong, I love you and this is the only way we’ll be together, so stop struggling. I’ll see you once I finish my masterpiece, okay?” Sliding down his legs, I gripped them tightly dragging him towards the edge of the cliff.

“Hanbin! Please, stop!” His hands dug into the earth trying to hold on but I couldn’t or else it’ll all be over. “Where is all this coming from?! I thought that we were fine and happy!”

“Fine? Happy? Baby, you don’t know what that is!” Stopping, I put my foot on his throat making it impossible for him to turn his head – he was finally only looking at me. “Do you want to know the real reason I was living in the mountains before you came picking me up?”

“D-Didn’t you s-say your p-parents -,” Putting a little pressure to shut him up, he grabbed my shoe still struggling with his lower half.

“Those people we’re harmful from the beginning. They said that I was weird for wanting to draw and that I had a disease because I liked boys instead of girls. They said that the reason bad stuff was happening to them was because I wasn’t normal! But what is normal? Doesn’t matter anymore because I killed them off and made it look like I was kidnapped in the process, and guess what? No one questioned it.” Taking a deep breath, again, I smiled down on him wanting him to only see my happy side. “All your friends, I killed them too so that you could only be mine. I wanted you all for myself but those people just kept coming and coming and coming! So, now, I’m doing us both a favor. We’ll be together forever once I finish my painting and show the world just how beautiful you really are.”

Removing my foot, he coughed still trying to crawl away but it was too late, we were already at the edge. Taking his arms, I turned him so that his back was facing the water and without hesitation I pushed him, watching as he screamed for me before hitting the water. There were rocks at the bottom of the waterfall which meant that he stood no chance of surviving. Waiting, his body floated up – unmoving - the current carrying it into the small river that I had told him about only a few moments prior. Picking up the bucket, I rushed down the mountain wanting to make it before it started to form a crust or clot up as it would be harder to use. Running towards the room that held my masterpiece, I hide the bucket a little as Halmeoni came out of her room dressed in her farming attire.

“Have you seen that good-for-nothing child?” Shaking my head, I smiled at her wanting her to be reassured with my lie. “I hope he went and got what I asked of him.”

“Well at the end of our walk he said that he was going down to the port for something.” She sighed rolling her eyes as she walked past me and into the fields.

“I told him to go to the market, not the port.” Laughing, I ran into the room closing the door and picking up my brush I dipped it into the red liquid as I smeared it into the sun that I had painted behind him.

He got to be the sun because he was bright and shined light into my dark life. He got to be the sun because he was the most important, while I’ll be the heart that sits on top of that painted on shirt. Finishing the sun, I looked at my work as it was almost finished, all that was left was me. Taking the knife, the blood had started to dry on it but my reflection still showed the me that I’ve been running again from. Swiping the knife across my arm it drew blood, so quickly dabbing my brush at it, I painted a heart over where his actually one was and I kept going over it until it stood out more than it probably should have. Grabbing something, I fanned the painting wanting it to dry which didn’t take long. Flipping it over, I took my pencil writing my last words hoping that whoever finds it sees how deeply in love that we were with one another.

_‘Our love should have been passionate like the red that makes its debut throughout this painting, but we were constantly interrupted by those who didn’t know what passion truly was. His beauty was beyond what this painting has shown, and there’ll never be another like him. My poor beautiful farm boy, Yunnie._

  * _Kim Hanbin_ _aka BinBin’_



Sighing my name on the bottom, I flipped it back over kissing his lips that would never smile again. Picking back up the knife, I pushed it straight through my aching heart hoping that he’ll never leave me again. He’ll only be mine until the world ends which means that I’ll follow him where he goes – I’ll never give up on this lonely love of ours.


	8. Life 5: A Timed Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is set during the 1988 Summer Olympics that were held in Seoul, Korea.  
> \- Yunhyeong is Terminally Ill with an Unknown Disease   
> \- Hanbin is a Regular High Schooler

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, just so you know they become friends rather quickly.

Seoul, 1988

Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair glad that school was almost over. Having to button this stupid jacket all the way up made me feel suffocated, and not to mention that I get in trouble every time I undo at least one button. My ass already is in enough pain seeing as how Mr. Choi thinks of his stick as a bat. Scratching my neck, I looked at my friends as they sat around me talking loudly about the upcoming Olympic games. To be honest, I could care less.

“Oh, before I forget, did you guys get your pin pal letters?” Blinking, I had totally forgot about those letters seeing as how I haven’t gotten one in two weeks. “My pin pal is such a funny person. She’s always talking about how weird her friends and teachers are.”

“And that’s funny?” They all turned to look at me as I couldn’t understand how that could make you laugh.

“You’re such a buzzkill, Hanbin! Now, I know why you can never get a girlfriend.” Rolling my eyes, I stood grabbing my bag as Junhoe liked to just hear himself talk.

“It isn’t like any of you have girlfriends either, so the problem applies to you as well.” Pushing Jinhwan’s chair in, more, so that I could walk around him, I flipped them off before heading out the door.

All they ever talk about is girlfriends and it’s starting to get annoying. They’re lucky that they’re my only close friends at the moment. Heading towards my locker, I changed out my slippers for my favorite dirt covered sneakers before walking out into the sun. Taking a deep breath, it cleared my head a little, so rolling my shoulders I went to the gate not expecting to be stopped once I got there. Glancing towards the wall, I saw some guy wearing a grey shirt with a black bomber jacket and dark jeans – his face didn’t match his clothing choice.

“Hanbin? Kim Hanbin?” Nodding, he ran to me grabbing my arm dragging me away from the direction of my home. “Wow, I never thought that we would meet! I’m Yunhyeong, Song Yunhyeong.”

“My pin pal?!” I was tripping over myself to keep up with him as he nodded glancing towards me to give me a smile. “Wait!”

He halted to a stop causing me to run into him finally able to catch my breath. Letting me go, I straightened myself out unbuttoning my uniform jacket to show the crisp white shirt underneath. Looking him over once more, he had his hands in his pocket still smiling as if he didn’t just kind of kidnapped me.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in school or something?” Shaking his head, I licked my lips as I needed some water.

“School? I haven’t been in school since middle school.” He laughed as if that was a good thing and I couldn’t understand. “Do you even know where your letters were being sent to?”

“No?” Sighing, he patted my shoulder in a comforting way that had me jerking away his hand – I don’t know him like that.

“Then, I’ll keep a secret.” Turning away from me, he kept walking in the direction that he was pulling me in earlier and I could have turned and went home but I ran after him. “You know from the way how you write, I thought that you would be some short nerd with glasses but you really have the delinquent look down packed without even trying.”  

“W-What is that supposed to mean?!” I was more offended than I should be as I get it all the time from teachers and the people around me, but it’s not like I can just change my face.

“It means that you get 10 extra points for being a bad boy.” Confusion had settled in as he went into this ice cream parlor and I continued to follow behind him. “What do you want? It’s on me!”

“Uh, vanilla.” He gave me this weird look but ordered me a vanilla cone nonetheless. “What was that look for?”

“I just never thought that you would be a vanilla type of person, but looks can sure be deceiving.” He was just like my friends – he liked to hear himself talk because all that was coming out was nonsense.

“Why are you here? Or more so, why did you seek me out?” I was surprised when he turned around grabbing my wrist causing me to stare at him as if he was crazy.

“Because you said that you’d help me complete my list, so enjoy the ice cream and I’ll see you in a few days.” Shoving the cone in my mouth, he skipped away leaving me to just stand there.

What the hell was that?

Seoul, 1988 (2 Weeks Later)

After what had happened two weeks ago, I’ve been on the lookout for him but he didn’t show up which was weird because he said a few days not a few weeks. Why should I even care? My friends have been calling me a nut job every day for creeping around the school gates and not wanting to hang out with them. So, giving up on my search, I asked them if they wanted to hang out today only for them to jump down my throat saying that I had to pay. Wow, just in my pockets.

Leaving the school, I stood next to Jinhwan who was oddly quiet today and on the other side of me was Donghyuk and Bobby who were laughing loudly about something, and behind them was Junhoe and Chanwoo who were arguing about some game at the arcade. Sighing, we turned the corner only to be blocked by the person I’ve been on the hunt for almost every day for the last two weeks. He was dressed more for his face as he had a slightly open button down that was half-tucked into his jeans with a gold chain and a pair of Chuck Taylor’s.

“Yo, Hanbin!” The whole group stopped looking between the both of us as I just stood there with my mouth slightly open.

“How do you know him? Why is he so handsome? Are you, you know? Is he older than us?” Questions came at me fast as they took a few steps back allowing us some type of privacy.

“Uh, he’s my pin pal; he’s handsome because of his parents? No, I’m not – I think, and no, he’s the same age as us.” With those questions answered, I jerked their hands off of me taking notice of how he was acting different than he did the first day we met. “I gotta go; I’ll hang with you guys this weekend, okay?”

Jogging towards the other, he put his arm around my shoulder walking me away from my group of friends. When did I become so complacent?

“First on my list: The Arcade.” A smile had come onto his face but it wasn’t nostalgic or anything like that, it was one of those smiles when you’re going somewhere you’ve never been before.

“You’ve never been to the Arcade?” He nodded as if it wasn’t a big deal when it clearly was. “How?! That’s the staple of our lives at this moment.”

“My parents wouldn’t let me.” Shrugging, we entered the arcade causing me to shake my head as I went to go get us some coins.

Getting a little less than what I get with my friends, I split it in half and handing him his handful, I went towards the _Space Invaders_ ’ machine not really caring where he went. It’s best to let him figure out what he wants to do in places like this instead of dragging him around. Putting my coins in the machine, I grabbed the joystick with a loose hand while placing my finger on the button waiting for it to start up. I was on the fourth round when a voice came up behind me scaring me, and like any other time I had moved to the wrong place which ended in me dying. Sighing, I wanted to kick the machine but thought against it as the Manager got on my ass the last time.

“You’re good at this. Can I try?” Nodding, I moved out of the way allowing him to get in front of the machine.

As soon as he started playing he was better than I thought, he even beat my high score which had me a little heated but I knew that that meant I would have to work harder. After winning, he gave me a big smile that I couldn’t fully return, instead I went to the _Donkey Kong_ game as I was better at that one. Playing, I won the game which had me doing a little victory dance only for him to ask if he could try. I got a little cocky thinking that he couldn’t beat me but I was slapped in the face when his score was one above mine – and that smile. We went through the whole arcade, we even played two-player games and some I won but he had the upper hand on majority of them.

“I thought you’ve never been to an arcade?” Glaring at him, I felt cheated causing him to laugh as he shook his head.

“I haven’t. Why would I lie about something like that?” S-So, he was naturally good? “Anyway, thanks, I’ll see you later.”

“Wait!” He took a few steps back and turning towards him my stomach grumbled a little. “Do you want to get something to eat?”

“Nah, I can’t eat outside of my home. Parents orders.” Walking away, he waved me off leaving me to watch as he disappeared out of view.

His parents are weird. Going home, I picked up a pizza on the way not wanting to worry my parents with cooking for me after having already eaten. As soon as I walked in the house the home phone rang causing me to pick it up as it Bobby saying that the gang was on their way. Nodding, I couldn’t just tell them not to come as they’ll still show up unless I had a valid reason. Leaving my bedroom door open, I flopped down on the floor open the box as I grabbed a slice before walking away from it to change into something comfortable. Coming out of the bathroom, I had eaten most of the pizza and I wasn’t really all that surprised to see that the others had arrived and were attacking the food that was supposed to be meant for only me. They’re Neanderthals.

“So, why did you come over?” Snatching another slice before anyone else could take it, I jumped up onto my bed sitting next to Junhoe who had taken to laying down.

“Obviously, because we’re curious about your pin pal – why else would we come over?” Kicking the back of Donghyuk’s head, he fell over – dramatically – holding onto where my foot had just been. “I hate you.”

“I don’t like you either.” Rolling my eyes, I sighed as I really had nothing to say about him. “Well, what do you want to know?”

“Just about him in general, he looks and seems cool.” Munching on the crust, I tilted my head from side-to-side as he was cool.

“Uh, his name is Yunhyeong and he can’t eat outside of his home nor has he ever been to an arcade until today but he’s extremely good at games – he’s even better than me.” They snorted at my words but I didn’t really say anything funny.

“Everyone is better than you at games.” Throwing the last corner of my crust at Chanwoo, I scooted back until I was leaning against the wall wiping the crumbs off my face. “Is he from around here? Like why isn’t he in school if he’s the same age as us?”

Shrugging, I didn’t care to ask those questions; plus, we’ve only met two times and talked about stupid stuff in our letters. We didn’t really care to get to know more about one another.

“He could be a serial killer and you’re just willingly hanging out with him.” Jinhwan spoke causing everyone to nod but I shook my head because he didn’t even look capable.

“A serial killer so close to the Olympics? It’s not likely. The city has been regulated for the last few months as the athletes are going to arrive in a week. Oh, who’s going?” School was out for the whole time that the Olympics were to be held seeing as how they knew the number was going to be few on who attended.

“Not me, sadly, I’ll be at home watching it on TV.” The rest nodded after Bobby’s words which meant that they were all going to be piled up at either his place or Chanwoo’s – they had the largest TVs. “Are you?”

“No, but I want to.” We all agreed as it would be so cool to watch it up close instead of it always being on TV.

The Olympics was a proud moment for Korea and we’ll all be stuck at home supporting in front of a box.

Seoul, 1988 (2 Weeks Later)

Today was our last day as the first day of the Olympics was being held tomorrow, and like always we had decided to all sleep over at Bobby’s in preparation for the games. I was more excited than I had ever been and leaving the gate I was met with Yunhyeong standing there in all his glory with a smile on his face. Everyone greeted him as they’ve become close with him over the last two weeks, and as they left telling me to not be late I waved them off.

“Are you doing anything tomorrow?” Nodding, he frowned a little before digging in his pockets. “Oh, well I had an extra ticket to the Olympics and I wanted to know if you would go with me.”

“W-W-WHAT?!” I was having a heart attack because his words sounded like a dream come true to me, but then again, I did promise to go over to Bobby’s.

“If you can’t go then it’s fine, I’ll just give the tickets to someone else.” Grabbing his hand, I stopped him not wanting him to walk away just yet.

“Follow me.” Running, I looked for my friends who shouldn’t have made it that far and seeing them at the corner I jumped on them. “G-Guys?!”

“Hanbin, why are you out of breath? Also, can you get off of me?” Oh, apologizing to Bobby who I was practically hanging off of, I got down on my own two feet.

“Y-Yunhyeong invited me to go with him to the Olympics tomorrow, and I wanted your feedback.” They all looked at me as if I had three heads only to start screaming a few seconds later once my words had fully sunk in.

“Of course you have to go! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity!” Nodding as they were right, I walked towards Yunhyeong who was standing against the wall giving us a chance to talk.

“I’ll go with you tomorrow.” He gave me a bright smile before handing me the ticket and telling me to wait for him outside of the stadium. “See you later.”

Running home, I told my parents causing them to stare at me in shock as they would have to watch the games at work with colleagues, but not me. I’m going to be able to smell the athletes sweat and just the air of the stadium that I’ve been watching them build for the last few years. Going into my room, I picked out my outfit knowing that it would be warm but not that warm as it was fall even though it was the Summer Olympics. I went to bed earlier not wanting my excitement to eat me alive because if I didn’t go to sleep now I would never go to sleep.

When morning came, I woke up earlier than I should have, I changed into my outfit and even at breakfast by myself, before running out of the house and towards the stadium. Arriving, people were already outside lined up waiting for the doors to open which meant that I wasn’t the only excited one. Someone was outside selling coffee, and seeing as how it was cold, I went over buying two cups before jumping in line to wait on Yunhyeong. The sun had started coming out and as the doors opened the line began to move causing me to look around as he still wasn’t here. Gulping down the rest of my coffee, I held the cup that I brought for him trying to keep it warm even though that was kind of hard with the morning breeze.

“Hanbin?” Jumping, I looked over to see him standing next to me looking extremely drained – there was no color in his face and his body seemed to sway with the breeze. “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting.”

“No. Here, I got you some coffee.” Handing it to him, he pushed it away causing me to pout a little. “What do you not like coffee?”

“I can’t drink it.” Nodding, I put it to my lips instead gagging at the disgusting taste as it was now cold. “The line is longer than I thought it would be.”

“Well, it is opening day, so everyone got here extra early.” As soon as the words left my mouth, he looked at me with an eyebrow raised only to grab his chest and head. “Are you okay?”

“Y-Yeah.” Lifting his head, blood was running out of his nose causing it to drip onto his clothing, and as if I had saw it coming he fell to the ground.

“Yunhyeong? Yunhyeong! Can you hear me?!” Kneeling down, I shook him but he didn’t move at all. “HELP! Can somebody help us?!”

Security came running over asking me questions that I couldn’t really answer, and as one went to go call for an ambulance I sat on the ground with his head in my lap. Wiping his nose with the napkins that one of the guards had given me but it still didn’t stop the blood that was rushing it. When the ambulance had arrived, I stuffed the napkins up his nose hoping that it would help only for them to become drenched in the blood. What is going on?

I rode with him to the hospital watching as they did everything they could to get him to wake up, and when we arrived they rushed him out of the ambulance and into the OR. Standing outside of the door, my heart was pounding hard in my chest because he was fine yesterday, so what happened in that short amount of time? A nurse had come to me shaking her head sighing a little as she asked me to follow her.

“Is he going to be okay?” She leads me to a room and opening the door it looked lived in. “Who’s room is this?”

“Yunhyeong’s. He’s one of our long-term patients, and up until recently he’s been a good kid, staying in his room and going to his treatments. But then a month ago, he just suddenly disappeared leaving us a note to say that he’d be back later that night and going against our better judgement we listened and he came back.” Biting my lip, I thought back to how he gave me that confused look when I asked why he wasn’t in school. “He’s pushing himself because he knows that his time is running out, so just sit and wait here. He’ll be out of the OR and back to his normal self once he wakes up.”

I wanted to say something but she had left closing the door behind her not even given a chance to say anything. Sighing, I sat down next to his bed rubbing my face because I would have never guessed. He didn’t even look sick but here his nurse is telling me that his days are numbered. How many days? Would he even tell me if I asked?

Seoul, 1988 (2 Days Later)

We were 3 days into the Olympics and he was still knocked out cold. I had the TV on in his room watching as I moved around cleaning and picking up not wanting him to wake up to a mess – he seemed like a neat freak. Sighing, I glanced at his peaceful figure wanting to punch him but thought against it as he was already in enough pain. I’ve been coming here every day in hopes to yell at him when he woke up, only to realize that I’d probably let my emotions get the best of me and shed a tear or two. To be honest, I’m just glad that he isn’t dead.

“H-Hanbin?” His voice was hoarse and groggy and as if I was his mother, I held his hand tightly in my own worry covering my face. “I’m s-sorry.”

“For what, idiot?” He smiled slowly bringing my hand to his lips he kissed it in a thankful gesture.

“For the O-Olympics.” Shaking my head, I shrugged letting his hand go to get him some water.

“Don’t worry, I like watching it on TV better anyway.” His smile was sad causing me to push the water in his face so that he could stop worry about useless things. “Also, why didn’t you tell me?”

“I told you that it was secret, didn’t I?” Rolling my eyes, I gave him a small smile watching as he drunk the whole cup letting out a satisfied groan the moment it was pulled from his lips. “Thank you for staying with me.”

“I couldn’t just leave you; plus, you got blood all over my pants, so I’m here to get the dry cleaning bill.” He laughed before sitting up causing me to move back a little as we were too close to one another. “H-How many days do you have left?”

“I was told that this was my last week and I already wasted my last weekend and first day of the week knocked out.” Smoothing down his hair, he grabbed my wrist moving it so that he could hold it in his own once more. “But this life was fun while it lasted, I guess. I can’t believe I’ve made a new friend only a month before I’m no longer to be on this earth.”

My smile fell at his words not liking the feeling it left in my gut after hearing it. Grabbing the remote, I turned up the TV letting the games drown out my thoughts. We watched the whole thing until it came to the end as they showed the schedule for tomorrow which started early in the morning like how it always did. Turning it off, I watched as he ate and seeing as how he was fine, I grabbed a book opening it to the last page I left off on. I read fairly quick, so I was already four pages from where I started when he had put down his utensils showing that he was done eating. Folding the edge, I closed the book and grabbing his tray I stood taking it towards the door not wanting to make it harder on the nurses. Taking my seat, again, I picked back up the book glancing at him out of the corner of my eye as he laid down facing me.

“You stay here over night?” Shrugging, I did the first night and left the second, so I might stay tonight. “You should since I’m awake.”

Nodding, I licked my lips before flipping the page only to re-read the same line over and over again. Why was he staring so intensely?

“Yes?” Closing the book for a second time, I sat it down next to his leg giving my full undivided attention.

“Nothing, I was just wondering if you were going to be here on my last day.” Swallowing the lump in my throat, I had thought about that as well.

“Only if you want me to be. We don’t go back until the Olympics are over, so I have time.” He nodded flashing me one of his many smiles and I couldn’t help but feel like his mother, or father. “How long have you’ve been in the hospital?”

“Since I graduated middle school. I fainted at the ceremony, I was rushed here only to be told that I had some incurable disease that they couldn’t pin point. I’ve had so many tests done on me, but they all come up negative, so they just gave up in the end telling me to enjoy my life.” He scoffed a little – probably thinking about on all the hard times that he faced. “They say enjoy my life but I’m confined in this room all day, unless I ask to go for a walk around the building or something.”

“Does that mean you’ve never had your first kiss, or you know?” He laughed at the expectant look on my face because with his looks he’s surely – you know.

“I’ve had my first kiss but I haven’t had sex, if that is what you were wondering.” The look he gave me was greasy causing me to gag while swatting my hand at him. “Don’t worry, I’d rather die a virgin then have you take it.”

“Rude.” Chuckling, I suddenly became thoughtful as it must suck being in here 24/7. “How did you get the Olympics tickets?”

“My doctor. He said that he’d let me off the hook if I didn’t say anything to anyone, and you were the first person I thought of to go with.” That was kind of him. “Plus, you’re my only friend who isn’t confined to a hospital bed.”

Whatever thankfulness I was feeling towards him had disappeared at that statement. He’s lucky his days are numbered or else I’d kill him myself.

Seoul, 1988 (1 Week Later)

On the day he didn’t wake up, I had been there freaking out and after the small funeral that they had and everything, I just didn’t feel like myself anymore. I didn’t cry as I didn’t feel as though I had the right too seeing as how I haven’t known him for as long as everyone else did. But as I now sit in class with my friends around me talking and laughing I wished I did because this only reminded me of the first day we met. Pulling out the book that I read when I was with him, I opened it to see little scribbles on the bottom corners of my page. I couldn’t understand it with how slow I was flipping it, so holding the book in one hand I fanned the pages fast causing the words to stand out more to me than they first did.

‘ _Thank you for letting me enjoy my last month with you. Just so you know, I considered you my closest friend._ ’

The tears that I had been fighting back fell hard as my body shook from the sobs that I was holding. Harshly wiping my face, the tears wouldn’t stop as they began to fall faster this time catching the attention of my friends. They knew that Yunhyeong had passed away, but they didn’t know how much it was tearing me up on the inside.

“Hanbin, are you okay?” Shaking my head, I held the book tight to my chest hating that he was doing this to me.

I wished he had a few more years, so that we could get to know one another better, but maybe this short life was for the best because I could tell that my own wasn’t that long to begin with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last past life before I get back into the present, so I hope you guys enjoy it.


	9. Life 6: iKON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Year is 2018 and Things have gone back to normal.

After looking at our past lives, I couldn’t help but feel a little bitter as I died so early on, it was like I never had a chance to begin with. We worked hard on the other five episodes, not even bringing it up because we knew that the rest of the members would poke fun at us. Not to mention that our schedule had gotten extremely hectic with us filming in Hawaii, then we started our tours up again, and not to mention promoting our new song.

Hanbin seemed to hang around Bobby and Jinhwan Hyung more which I didn’t mind – it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that he was kind of avoiding me. I would too, seeing as how he killed me in our fourth life; I’ve also been kind of wary of Junhoe as well. I can’t believe he shot me over some money, and then it was Chanwoo who had ordered me to be killed, of all people. He was a brat even in his past life. I’m just glad that none of the other members killed me or else I’d have to leave the group in fear of being murdered in this life.

Snickering, I was sitting on the couch while Donghyuk and Bobby were seated on the floor watching this new drama that had come out. The plot was nothing new really, but this is our first break in a while, so they wanted to do something out of the norm. I didn’t blame them because Jinhwan Hyung had offered to cook for us even though he didn’t really know how to – if you count making ramyeon then I guess he has some experience.

“Hyung, are you okay?” Blinking, I looked down to see that the drama was on commercial and they were staring at me so intensely.

“Huh? Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” Running my hand through my hair, I laid my head on my hand waiting for them to tell me why they thought I wouldn’t be okay.

“You’ve been smiling and laughing to yourself for the past 10 minutes and it’s creepy.” Laughing, I shook my hand trying to get them to turn back to the TV as the drama was coming back on.

A few seconds later and their attention was back on the drama which had me sighing a little in relief. I don’t need them thinking I’m even more crazy than I already am, which was kind of hard to do. A bedroom door opened causing me to lean over and stare down the hall to see that it was only Chanwoo who was yawning and scratching his side.

“How was your nap?” Smiling at him, he shrugged before heading towards the kitchen only to back out at the sight of Jinhwan Hyung.

“Why is he cooking? I don’t want to die.” He was whispering but it was still loud causing something to go flying at his head which he luckily ducked. “Also, why are they using our kitchen? And TV?”

“It’s bigger than ours; plus, it’s no fun down the hall, especially seeing as how we have to listen to Junhoe screaming in his room by himself. There really has to be something wrong with him.” Laughing at Bobby’s words, we all nodded in agreement because he was weird one.

“To be honest, I think he wants to ruin your kitchen instead of our own because he doesn’t want to clean it up. We all know Yunhyeong Hyung is a neat freak, so he’ll clean it up.” Scoffing, I rolled my eyes not liking how they just defaulted cleaning to me – of course, I was still going to do it.

It became quiet after that as Chanwoo plopped down on the couch next to me watching the drama with the other two, who were way too invested. Standing, I headed into the kitchen to see what Hyung was up to and I couldn’t help but sigh a little in relief as it was something simple and easy to make. For a second I thought he was going he was going to try to make something hard and intricate. Opening the fridge, I grabbed me a can of pop and opening it I sipped on it a little watching him as I made my way out of the kitchen. We’ll probably be getting takeout again. Sitting back down on the couch, I decided to join in on the drama watching not wanting to go to my room in case a fire had started.

“She should pick the second guy!” Donghyuk’s voice rang out loud as the lead actress was conflicted on who to choose. “The main guy is an asshole!”

“But he’s rich.” Chanwoo joined in which had Donghyuk turning around with a glare on his face. “What? He is, and we all know that she’s going to choose him anyway.”

“Like I said, the plot is nothing special.” Mumbling the words into my can, I pulled it to my lips taking a long sip.

“Whoever writes for these dramas must not leave the house a lot, or they’re stuck in lala land to think that any conscious person who pick an asshole just because he’s rich. He’s been mean and pushing her around the whole time, why wouldn’t she choose someone who actually cares for her and like her?” Shrugging, I knew that it was all just a fantasy, but logically Bobby was right.

“Nice guys finish last, right?” Grabbing the remote, I changed it to something else not caring to hear them bickering until dinner was ready.

“I’m home!” We all turned towards the front door to see Hanbin walking in with a big smile on his face. “It seems that everyone is here.”

“Yeah, Jinhwan Hyung is cooking.” I’ve never seen someone run that fast before and just like Chanwoo, he backed out the kitchen dodging some paper towel.

“Yunhyeong Hyung, can I talk to you for a minute?” Nodding, I stood following him into his room ignoring the whispers that the others thought no one heard.

Flopping onto his bed, I moved around waiting on him to speak and I was more than surprised when he got down on his knees in a deep bow. Getting off the bed, I gave him a deep bow as well not really knowing what was going on.

“H-Hanbin? Can you get up, please?” Climbing back up onto the bed, I couldn’t help but laugh as this wasn’t like him at all.

“I just feel that I need to apologize for killing you like that, and you know, just watching you die 5 times.” Ruffling his hair, I shrugged a little thankful for the apology but I wasn’t going to let him know that.

“At least you learned your lesson. Now, in this life when we get old, don’t make any more promises on wanting to be stuck with me or else I’ll kill you. Who said that I want to be stuck with you 6 over and over again, especially you?” Flipping my non-existent long hair, I smiled at him causing him to give me one back. “You were kind enough to bury me almost 3 out of the 5 times, so I’ll cut you some slack.”

“Whew! I just had to get that off my chest as it’s been bugging me these last few days.” Standing, together, we went back out into the hallway as the smell of something burning was hitting my nose. “I’ll start calling for delivery.”

Nodding, I went into the kitchen only to see our members fighting a small fire as if the building was on fire. Picking up the pan, I put it on a different burner turning off the one that it was on and grabbing some baking soda I dumped it into the pan putting out the fire. Shaking my head, I moved them all out to the living room telling them that no one besides me is allowed to cook in the kitchen, unless a professional was to come.

They’re a headache but I don’t think I’d be able to live without them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank everyone for reading this story, and actually liking it. 
> 
> Thank you for sticking around and I'm hoping to publish another story soon.


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